infinite giving Archives - Dr. Ivan Misner®
gain

It’s OK to Gain

Today’s blog is an excerpt from the book, “Infinite Giving – The 7 Principles of Givers Gain®”, by Dr. Ivan Misner, Greg Davies, and Julian Lewis. The book is available on either the Amazon.com or Amazon.co.uk websites as a paperback book or a Kindle eBook download. Use these links to gain your copy or order multiple copies and “begin the giving” by gifting the book to others. Purchase the paperback book version at https://tinyurl.com/InfiniteGiving or download the Kindle Book version at https://tinyurl.com/InfiniteGivingKindle today.

infinite giving 7 principles

Givers Gain is two words and receiving is part of the philosophy

Right at the heart of Infinite Giving is the philosophy of Givers Gain. Remember the second word, Gain. Givers Gain is two words and receiving is part of the philosophy. Being a good receiver of a gift is vital to ensure the philosophy works and that it leads to a life of Infinite Giving. Without accepting that it is OK to gain, a giver will soon find themselves out of resources, and the giving will stop. It is vital that the great givers also gain what they need so that they can give over and over. In that way, Infinite Giving becomes a part of who they are and how they act daily. Many people talk about the concept of “you only get out what you put in”. This is often true of gaining within the philosophy of Givers Gain. Giving first is fundamental. But, you cannot constantly give at your own expense.

Brenda Jones’ Liver Story

The story of Brenda Jones illustrates this point beautifully. In 2016, Brenda Jones was a 69-year-old great-grandmother. She had spent a long year on the donor list waiting to receive a liver. On July 18, a hospital in North Texas called—they had a viable liver for her. It was the call she and her family had been waiting for; there was hope.

Meanwhile, 23-year-old Abigail Flores had a crisis, and she had suffered complete liver failure. She also needed a liver and only had hours to live. Her situation was more urgent than Brenda’s. Without a transplant, doctors feared Abigail had maybe one more day to live. The transplant surgeon Dr. Greg McKenna called Brenda and asked her if she would give up her donor organ to save the life of this young woman.

Brenda agreed to give the organ to Abigail. She said of the gift, “In my heart, I wouldn’t have been able to live with the liver if I had let this little girl die. I just knew this is what I had to do.” Brenda was placed back at the top of the donor list and got a new liver just four days later. Both women recovered together in the same ward.

There will always be people who need a new liver. However, Brenda gave away her first chance for what she saw as the greater good. This does not mean, however, that she needed to sacrifice her own life and pass up every opportunity offered to her. It was right for her to accept the second transplant and the new lease of life that came along with it.

Create Opportunities to Gain

It is OK to accept and create opportunities to gain provided you are an equal part of the Givers Gain Community. If you have put in, then it’s right that you should take out. Indeed, even if you have not put in then sometimes you just have to fill your cup so that it may overflow into your saucer.

This is the way Givers Gain works. We must be receptive to gaining. Even the biggest givers need to gain from time to time. One tendency when you are a giver is to push people away saying, “It’s OK,” I do not need help. This can come over as not wanting to impose or, more dangerously interpreted, that you are in some way superior to others in your community.

Build Trust in Your Network

Sometimes we don’t want to be a burden or appear vulnerable in front of our peers. The fact is, in a room full of people, there will always be some who are growing, some who are successful, and there will be those who are facing a challenge. We know it is better to face challenges together. The confidence to be vulnerable comes from building trust within a team or a group. When trust is high and strong, then people are more willing to ask for the help they need. Building trust in your network is a key strategy to unlock the power of the gain side of Givers Gain.

Our experience is that people can be very uncomfortable about seeking gain. They believe that Givers Gain is all about giving and that the gaining should not even cross their mind. This is an understandable thought process; however, it is also all part of the philosophy to ask your community for support when you need it and be open to gaining as much as you are to give.

Give the “Excess”

If you do not get this right, then eventually you will be running on empty and you will drop out of your Givers Gain Community. We should only be giving the “excess” of what we have available, and at the same time by gaining, you refill your reserves and allow others the opportunity to experience the gift of giving. We are often too busy in our routines to recognize when others are experiencing “pain.” This oversight is not through neglect or an unwillingness to assist. It is simply because sometimes life gets in the way.

Ask for what you need and not what you think the community can provide. The fact is that in high-trust groups people are very willing to work with you on what you need. We suggest that when the time is right you should ask for what you need and not what you think the community can provide.

Andy’s Asking Story

This is illustrated by Andy’s story. Andy spent two years in his BNI group, giving thoughtful referrals, doing the one-to-ones, and not always feeling much return. He knew the group trusted him and he got the odd referral here and there. The problem was that he was simply not being clear in what he wanted to gain from his group and membership.

He got to a point where his business was at a make or break time … so he stood up and asked the room for help. He said, “I want to be here; I want to succeed, and I could use all of your help to get there. I have three months to turn things around otherwise I’ll have to leave and seek employment.” Within an hour he had referrals and, more importantly, ideas and feedback. Six months later, his business model changed (thanks to a member’s advice). He now has regular repeat referrals from all of the business community, and he now asks for what he wants.

When you’ve built a meaningful relationship, you’ve earned the right to ask. The responsibility is on us to ask for assistance when needed. Therefore, I am asking for your help in making the book, “Infinite Giving”, an Amazon Best Seller this week by buying it as a Kindle eBook at https://tinyurl.com/InfiniteGivingKindle today.

7 Principles

The 7 Principles of Givers Gain®

Today’s blog is an excerpt from the book, “Infinite Giving – The 7 Principles of Givers Gain®”, by Dr. Ivan Misner, Greg Davies, and Julian Lewis. The book is available on either the Amazon.com or Amazon.co.uk websites as a paperback book or a Kindle eBook download. Use these links to buy your own copy or order multiple copies and “begin the giving” by gifting the book to others. Purchase the paperback book version at https://tinyurl.com/InfiniteGiving or download the Kindle Book version at https://tinyurl.com/InfiniteGivingKindle today.

infinite giving 7 principles

The 7 Principles of Givers Gain

The 7 Principles of Givers Gain are a guide to obtaining and sustaining the wonderful concept of Infinite Giving. They are also a check and measure for every aspect ensuring that people maintain harmony in their lives.

7 principles

   The 7 Principles of Givers Gain
    1) Are They in Your Light?
    2)  Give Without Expectation.
    3)  Give More Than Expected.
    4) Give What You Can Afford.
     5) It’s OK to Gain.
     6) Stay Humble.
     7) Show Gratitude.

 

Live a life of Infinite Giving

People who live Givers Gain believe that the world is a better place when our first thought is to give. We codified the 7 Principles of Givers Gain in this book as a way of putting structure around a philosophy. It is designed to help people who wish to adopt the concept and use it to its full potential. The principles are the result of the combined experience of the authors. Furthermore, they build upon our thoughts and subsequent decades of implementing the concept.

Givers Gain is an elegant and simple phrase that people can unite behind both personally and as a group. Its simplicity is its power as with lots of great philosophies of life. Because it is so simple, it opens itself up to wild interpretation by those who hear it. Yet when left unchecked, simplicity can get corrupted and misinterpreted. When this happens the value and power of the philosophy are reduced both personally and collectively. The 7 Principles are designed to magnify the positive effect of the philosophy of Givers Gain.

Givers Gain starts with us all taking personal responsibility for our actions in the context of the 7 Principles, which will lead to a personal life of Infinite Giving. Once we have set the standard for ourselves, we can then move on to our wider community in ever-increasing circles. In addition to creating a much bigger impact on the world through Givers Gain, the principles introduce some new elements to the philosophy that allow it to move beyond its beginnings in BNI and into the global population with structure and purpose. One such element is the idea of Givers Gain Communities.

Givers Gain Communities

The Givers Gain Communities are distinct groups of people who have a strong connection with each other and to the philosophy of Givers Gain. Givers Gain Communities started in BNI. The 7 Principles of Givers Gain allow many diverse groups of people to adopt Givers Gain as a philosophy in life and business. These communities, whether a part of BNI or not, can use these principles to ensure that their giving and the benefits derived from giving are sustainable forever. When people in these communities understand the power of Givers Gain, they can use the principles to ensure that their giving is appropriate and sustainable.

The 7 Principles also introduce the concept of fairness and equality to Givers Gain. If abused, the philosophy can be manipulated to gain but not to give by people with low levels of integrity. On the flip side to that, some people spend so much energy in giving that their gain fails to meet their basic needs, and this can cause them hardship. Once everyone has adopted the principles of Givers Gain, then the whole world can both give and gain in a way that is viewed as fair in modern society.

The principles are also there to protect active members of our Givers Gain Communities. We’ve seen people who have stepped away from a group or community without feeling the full benefit of Infinite Giving. It’s often accompanied by the phrase, “they just didn’t get it.” What we realized was, is that what they didn’t get was that there were steps that had to be taken. Plus, principles that had to be applied before they could become a part of the Givers Gain Community.

Imagine a world where diversity is a strength, and everybody can create success.

Giving will only be sustainable when the principles are applied in full and the process of Infinite Giving can begin. We do, however, understand that, on a global scale, there will always be an imbalance. Some people have more resources than others. Givers Gain is simply a philosophy that says if I give to you then you will be motivated to give to me or others within our Givers Gain Community. If enough people do this within the boundaries of the 7 Principles of Givers Gain, then communities around the world will be in a better place.

When Givers Gain is understood well, people can adopt the philosophy as a way of life. They can spread the word in their communities and make the world not just a better place but also a nicer place. We will achieve a world where everyone can thrive in line with their talent and as a result of their hard work.

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