Who's in Your Room Archives - Dr. Ivan Misner®
Motivation

Regain Your Motivation

Motivation comes from within you, not from outside you. No one can motivate you but yourself. I’m speaking long-term motivation. Many years ago, author Frederick Herzberg wrote about motivation in the Harvard Business Review, where he said that others can motivate you but only in the short term. He called that KITA (Kick in the… Anatomy – that’s really what he called it). On the other hand, long-term motivation comes from within. Everyone struggles with motivation at some point during their professional lives.

How do you motivate yourself when your motivation is low?

1. Minimize contact with negative people.

According to my book,  Who’s in Your Room?: The Secret to Creating Your Best Life, you make decisions based on the positive and negative things that happened with people from your past that you let into your life. That really resonates with people who let in negative individuals. Therefore, they make future decisions based upon their previous negative experiences. Some people complain as though it were an Olympic event. Keep clear of them while you are trying to regain your motivation. Surround yourself with positive people.

2. Maximize time with people that refuel your energy.

The quality of your life depends on the positive people in your room. The people in your life will make or break your success. You become the five or six people with whom you hang out the most. Surround yourself with positive people who make you want to “do” and “be” better.

3. Read/listen/watch positive things.

If you are feeling down, read a positive book. My newest book, Infinite Giving, explores the positivity of sharing with the 7 Principles of Givers Gain®. Listen to an audiobook or podcast with a positive message. Watch something that makes you laugh. Surround yourself with some things you love. Live a life of giving not just for the benefit of others, but most importantly for you as well.

4. Prioritize the items on your list. 

Make a list of the things you want to do and must do. Then, take that list and post it somewhere visible. Tackle something from that list every day. Focus first on the smallest item from your list as a short-term goal to achieve this week.  A small win this week can be very motivating during the month. Next, work on those items from your list that inspire you to take action and complete them this month. Eat the elephant one bite at a time. You will be amazed at the number of small items from your list you will accomplish during the month. The more small wins you accomplish this month, the better you will feel during the year. You will quickly become motivated to take action during the year to complete some of the bigger things from your list.

5. Remember your big picture.

If your motivation is low it helps to step out of your daily tasks and remember why you are doing what you do. Allow yourself to be motivated by your big picture and let your goals drive you. Remembering why you are doing what you do in business can most certainly help you find some new energy to keep going. Your goals will help motivate you to get back on the road to productivity and success in no time.

It is nearly impossible to feel motivated all the time. Sometimes it can feel like we are in a real doldrums slump. In this video, I expand upon these five tips for getting inspired when you’re lacking motivation. You will glean some powerful insights on what is causing your low motivation and how to become inspired to take action.

What do you do when your motivation level is lacking as well as your self-esteem? What do you do to regain the motivation needed to move on with your plans and pursue your endeavors? Please share your thoughts in the comments.

garage to global

Garage to Global ® – The Next Four Lessons

35 years ago, I started BNI literally in my garage and in a small room above my garage. I am truly an example of taking a business from a garage to global company. I am sharing this month twelve lessons that I’ve learned from scaling my company and making it grow globally. These are things that I did not necessarily learn in college to take my business literally from my garage to a global enterprise.

Here are another four lessons on how to scale your business.

Know your numbers to go from Garage to Global.

You must get really good with your numbers and you got to have those kinds of numbers. I’d recommend weekly reports that you want to make sure to generate so that you can eyeball how you’re doing. You cannot hit a future goal if you do not know how you’re doing today. The key numbers that will determine whether you’re going in the right direction or in the wrong direction.

Do six things a thousand times, not a thousand things six times.

If you want to be successful in business, focus on doing six things 1000 times. In BNI, it’s what we call “three plus one.” It is adding members, adding chapters, filling chapters and telling stories. Those are the key performance indicators for chapters. New BNI members should work on their networking education by reading books, watching YouTube videos, and having 121 meetings with people you really trust. Be a dog with a bone because persistence is a superpower.

Surround yourself with great people.

Look for the people who have values that are congruent with the values that you have. I’d recommend my book, “Who’s in Your Room?” It’s all about understanding your values and surrounding yourself in your room with the right people. If you have someone working for you who is not the right fit for you and your business, you’ve got to be able to let them go quickly.

Ignorance on fire is better than knowledge on ice.

As a new business, hire people with a great attitude and teach them. I prefer to hire somebody who is coachable and excited to be working for me. It’s okay to find ignorance on fire and coach them on how to do their job. When you do that, they will become very loyal to you because you’ve spent the time, mentoring and coaching them.

So these are another four lessons in how to take your business from “Garage to Global”. If you missed it, here is the link to the first blog in this series. This is all part of the garage the global material from a recent BNIpodcast that I’m working on right now for a future book. There’s more to come next week.

Best New Financial Success Books

“Who’s in Your Room” made it to the Best New Financial Success Books

I’m happy to announce that our book, “Who’s in Your Room: The Secret to Creating Your Best Life”, made it to BookAuthority’s Best New Financial Success Books.

Financial success is part of “creating your best life” and BookAuthority recognized that. BookAuthority collects and ranks the best books in the world, and it is a great honor to get this kind of recognition. Thank you for all your support!

Our book is available for purchase on Amazon.

Wine O'Clock

Wine O’Clock

Take a little Wine O’Clock time for YOU!

Life for people in this day and age is crazy busy. People will take up every spare moment in your life if you let them, so it is important to create a life that has “margins.” Build free time, family time, and personal time into the margins of your day-to-day existence. If you don’t schedule it, it won’t happen. You’ll be happier when you create margins—we promise. Schedule time to relax.

I have scheduled time to relax. Beth and I are taking a vacation this week with my good friend and co-author, Stewart Emery, with his wife. We have been enjoying this week together in Bordeaux France sipping wine and enjoying the sights.

In this video, we discuss “Margins”. You create “harmony” in your life by creating space in your life. Harmony is the access to the things that really matter to you and being fully present; while avoiding those things that do not.

“Who’s in Your Room?: The Secret to Creating Your Best Life”

This is the premise behind my newest book, co-authored with Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio. We believe this book can change people’s lives. Learn the secret to creating your best life.

https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom

Whatever you are in life, be a good one. Experience the best the world has to offer. Opportunities will open up for you when you do.

CHEERS!

doorman

This is no Joke

Your business NEEDS to have a doorman (or woman).

This is someone who helps control the flow of people into your world so that the negative influences who will cause stress and discomfort don’t even reach you.

What if I were to tell you that I learned a strategy after writing my most recent book, “Who’s In Your Room,” that happens to be as relevant and important for your NETWORK! This is your final opportunity to register for my upcoming FREE MasterClass called, Who’s In Your Network, on Thursday, May 2nd at 1pm ET (10am PT).

Can you imagine living a better life? Would you like to surround yourself with more supportive people? There’s hope! You see, the quality of your life and the success of your business depends on the people in your life.

Learn more and RSVP here: https://bni.synduit.com/WN0001

Inner Circle

I’d Like To Invite You Into My Inner Circle

You can be a founding member of Ivan’s Inner Circle.  We listened to your comments and it is now strictly the webinar platform and Facebook Community coaching along with live events.  I’d love to see you there.

I am hosting a free Master Class called, Who’s In Your Network, on Thursday, May 2nd at 1 pm Eastern Time (10 am Pacific Time). For the time in your area go this this URL: https://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/converter.html

I hope you are able to attend because it includes very impactful content relating to building the “right” network of people. It is based on content from my book, “Who’s In Your Room?” However, this Master Class will focus on applying the concepts from that book into your personal network. During this experience, I will help you assess who is in your network (aka your life) and who should stay in it.  Nearly every business owner that has experienced some type of challenge will admit that the root of this trying time was because they let someone into their network that was not aligned with their values. Whether this person did poor work, created drama and angst, or simply distracted you from your focus – they ended up not being a positive influence in your life or in your group. 

I’m going to be sharing my solution to this in the free Master Class, Who’s In Your Network?

The quality of your life is a direct reflection of who is in your network. How you manage who you let into your network is very important. This webinar is free and you are welcome to invite your fellow members and friends to it.  The class is sponsored by Ivan’s Inner Circle which has recently been changed to focus exclusively on my educational content.  I’d love to see you there.

To participate, please register here: https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourNetwork

Who’s In Your Network

Who Will You Let In Your Network?

Do you know the #1 source of business pain in the lives of most people?

It all stems from letting someone in their network that is not aligned with their values. This might be because you were born into it, like family! Or you chose it like friends, colleagues, acquaintances, or business partners. Regardless of how they got there, they are infiltrating the quality of your life and as a result, YOU SUFFER!

So you have a choice to make…

Allow them to impact you

OR

Make a change today!

I am hosting a MasterClass to help you not only make the choice, but also to give you tools and resources to make your NETWORK a safe space for only those who are worthy of entering. Join me for “Who’s In Your Network”

Thursday, May 2nd at 1pm ET (10am PT).

Please reserve your spot here: https://bni.synduit.com/WN0001

Feel Better Fast

Feel Better Fast and Make It Last

Dr. Daniel Amen believes that brain health is central to all health and success. When your brain works right, he says, you work right; and when your brain is troubled you are much more likely to have trouble in your life. His work is dedicated to helping people have better brains and better lives. In this video, Dr. Amen reveals his “BRAIN-XL” framework to help others feel better fast and make it last:

B for “Brain”

Your brain likes to do what it’s always done, even when that isn’t in your best interest. Getting stuck in unhelpful behaviors, holding grudges, and engaging in unproductive worrying all cause immense suffering. Work to optimize the physical functioning of your brain and shift your thinking habits to more positive practices for better health.

R for “Rational Mind”

It’s important to develop the mental discipline necessary for feeling better fast, including eliminating the ANTs (automatic negative thoughts), quieting your mind, focusing on gratitude, and even welcoming failure. With the help of some basic techniques, it’s possible for you to master your rational mind.

A for “Attachments”

Our attachments bring us the greatest joys and the most painful sorrows. It is when our relationships break people have the most mental health problems. Improving relationships and dealing with painful memories can help you achieve better outcomes. Learning how to improve your relationships can help you save your job, your marriage, your friendships, and all your relationships.

I for “Inspiration”

How to keep your pleasure center healthy in today’s world. Knowing and acting on your “why” is critical to living each day with joy. Purposeful people are happier and healthier, and live longer. Protecting your brain’s pleasure centers can help you live with passion and purpose.

N for “Nourishment”

In a world full of fast food and processed ingredients, our brains are affected by what we put into our bodies. Are you experiencing brain fog? A helpful nutritious diet can help you feel better quickly. Eating healthy foods can immediately boost your focus, memory and mood.

X for “X-Factor”

In any given situation, the X factor is the variable that has the most significant impact on the outcome.  Taking a look at the brain can be the difference between success and failure.

L for “Love”

Love yourself. Do things out of love of life or others. Caring for your body and brain affects your health and the health of generations to come. Love is the motivation that prompts us to put in the consistent effort and make the changes required to get healthy.

If you want to learn more about how the BRAIN-XL principles can help you stop the pain quickly, we recommend reading Dr. Amen’s new book, “Feel Better Fast and Make It Last.”

 

Feel Better Fast and Make It Last

Renowned physician, psychiatrist, brain-imaging researcher, and founder of Amen Clinics Dr. Daniel Amen understands how critical it is for you to know what will help you feel better fast, now and later. Dr. Amen has helped millions of people change their brains and lives through his health clinics, best-selling books, products and public television programs. In his book, Feel Better Fast and Make It Last, you’ll discover new, powerful brain-based strategies to quickly gain control over anxiety, worry, sadness, stress and anger, strengthening your resilience and giving you joy and purpose for a lifetime. If you want to feel happier, more optimistic, more joyful, and resilient, Dr. Amen’s groundbreaking new book is for you.

Please order his book on Amazon or Barnes and Noble

Please view Dr. Amen’s website for more information about his clinics.

Boundaries

Setting Boundaries in Life

To manage your room effectively, you need to establish boundaries on what behaviors you will or will not tolerate from other people. Furthermore, by building your mental walls, you will be clearer about the kind of behavior you expect from others. However, it will be easy for you to become a pushover if you do not do this. Many people are unaware of other people’s limits and will force their behaviors on you if you do not stand your ground.

Behavioral Disruption

When you set your boundaries, you can use a strategy called behavioral disruption. Behavioral disruption starts with communication, not confrontation. Clear, open, honest, and direct communication is almost always the best way to address issues, and applying this to managing your room is no exception. With behavioral disruption, your goal is to disrupt the process that allows your deal-breakers to be violated. Speak with the person about the issue. Then, share what your response will be the next time one of your deal-breakers is broken. Therefore, when the person crosses your boundaries, remove yourself.

In conclusion, you don’t have to subject yourself to drama anymore. This can be a life-changing experience. Therefore, if you do the work, set boundaries and trust the process. You’ll be glad you did.

This is the premise behind the newest book, “Who’s in Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life” by Ivan Misner, Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio. To order the book, please use this link:https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom

Harmony

Bringing Harmony to Your Room

Psychologists and therapists largely agree that awareness is curative. In this vein, we believe you likely won’t be able to have harmony in your room if you aren’t aware of the people and activities that bring you deep satisfaction.

To bring harmony to your room, find a place where you can sit in silence for a while. Have a pen and paper handy. We suggest you do not use a computer for this, as there is something about the process of writing in your own hand that brings additional depth to the process. You may find it helpful to gently close your eyes and focus your awareness on the process of your breathing for a while. Then begin to review the moments throughout your life when you felt most alive.

Ask yourself:

  • What am I doing when I feel most alive? Who am I with?
  • When am I enjoying myself so much that I lose track of time?
  • What do I look forward to doing the most?
  • What makes me feel fulfilled and satisfied?
  • When have I felt the proudest? Who was I with?

The goal here is simple harmony:

Identify the people, activities, and projects in your life that make you feel alive, satisfied, or fulfilled. To take this exercise a step farther, you can also write a paragraph about each activity that gives you a sense of aliveness. What does that look like? Describe each activity as vividly as possible, and take some time to think through what it would look like to experience each activity more fully—and more frequently. You might be surprised what you discover

Next, strive to say yes to more of the people and things that bring you fulfillment and a sense of aliveness, and strive to say no to the people and things that add stress and conflict within your room. When you consciously design your room, it is much easier to live a life of harmony.

This is the premise behind the newest book, “Who’s in Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life” by Ivan Misner, Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio. To order the book, please use this link: https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom

balance

Harmony vs. Balance

If you’re like most people, at some point in time—possibly even today—you’ve thought about having better balance in your life. In this crazy, hectic, technology-driven society, balance is an ever-present concern for many people.  I am often asked the secret to finding it in your life. How can you get the most out of work, life, friends, family, and all of your other activities? Would you like to learn the secret to balance? Are you ready? Here it is:

The Secret to Balance

Forget about balance; it’s an illusion. “Balance” assumes that we spend an equal amount of time in all or most areas of our life. It is like the image of the scales of justice where everything is completely in balance and equal. However, the concept implies that we must spend a certain portion of each week devoted in some equal measure to every item important in our life. The problem with this is that most people can’t actually achieve this on a regular basis. We tend to live such hectic, busy lives that it is incredibly difficult to fit it all in. Balance assumes that we spend equal amounts of time in each area of our life, which realistically, is impossible. I believe in harmony, in finding ways to creating synergy between the things you love to do and the things you’re paid to do (if you’re lucky, they’re one in the same!)

But there’s good news. We suggest striving for “Harmony“. You simply cannot have balance in your life. You can, however, find harmony. This is more than semantics—it is a different way of looking at life. It is possible to create a life that is in harmony with your values and vision of who you are and what you want to do. Even the symbol for harmony (the yin yang) is out of balance if you look at each piece separately.

Here are some keys to a life that’s in harmony.

  • Be Here Now
  • Set time aside for the things that really matter.
  • Find ways to integrate different parts of your life
  • When you’re 70 years old, you’re not going to wish you spent more time at the office

Harmony is created where harmony is sought. What do you do to create harmony in your life? I’d love to hear your thoughts so please share your ideas/tactics in the comment forum below.  Thanks!

Benign neglect

Mastering the Art of Benign Neglect

Benign neglect takes many forms. It’s any decision you make that allows a person in your room (or an activity associated with that person) to move toward the back, which in turn allows someone else to step a little bit closer to you.

Here are some examples:

  • Suggesting that instead of holding weekly in-person meetings with a colleague, you have virtual meetings every other week.
  • Strictly limiting your consumption of news or social media to a set amount of time each day.
  • Maintaining membership in an organization but no longer holding a leadership role.
  • Speaking with a friend when she calls, but only initiating a call to her once a month.
  • Opting out of “pub night” or “wine night” in favor of staying in with your spouse or partner.
  • Telling someone no.
  • Not responding to phone calls or emails quite so quickly.
  • Shifting your time and energy to other people and not being available as readily.

The bottom line here is that benign neglect works—even if you do it by accident. We’re suggesting that, when appropriate, you do it by design. It can be progressive—meaning that you gradually move into benign neglect over time. It doesn’t have to be overnight. This is the premise behind the newest book, “Who’s in Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life” by Ivan Misner, Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio.

To order the book, please use this link: https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom

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