words Archives - Dr. Ivan Misner®

Two people sitting in a room, at the same table, having the same meal at the same time, can actually be worlds apart. How? Because they look at the world through a different lens.

I love astronomy, and I’ve learned that by choosing different lenses or filters for my telescope, I observe different things in the night sky. By just changing the lens, the things I view can appear or disappear before my eyes. Objects can be overwhelmingly bright and painful to view or they can be a beautiful sight to behold. I believe our lives are similar. The lens we choose to see the world through can greatly influence the things we see and experience.

Years ago, I realized that I needed to evict people from my life because the lens they viewed the world through was negative, fearful, hurtful, and sometimes caustic. It was not the lens I chose.

Focus Your Lens, Change Your Words, and Inspire Your World

The first thing I realized when I came to this conclusion was that words matter. What you say about your world experience helps determine the world you live in and the people you attract into your world. What you put in your head shows up in your world. Whether you’re talking about an abundance mentality vs. a scarcity mentality, the law of attraction, or the glass being half full, words matter.

The most common example of this in my life involves my “being busy.” I talk to so many people who say, “You must be so busy.” I no longer say “yes” to that question. Today, I say, “I have a full life.” You can be busy — or you can have a full life. Almost everyone says that their life is busy. But busy shouldn’t be a goal you pursue. Having a “full life” is a goal worth pursuing and having a “full life” brings me joy. Truly words matter.

Back in 2012, I was diagnosed with cancer. I never said to people, “I have cancer.” I always said I was “diagnosed” with cancer. It was my diagnosis; it was not who I was. It took a while but now, rather than saying that I am in remission, I prefer to say, “I am healthy”. Words matter.

Last year drove home my point. While everyone was talking about being in lockdown or quarantine, I spoke about experiencing the “Great Pause” in life. The pause button was pushed on all of our lives for over a year. I found that how people responded to the Great Pause made a tangible difference relating to their experience and their life. Those people who learned how to embrace that mentality, when possible, were much happier than those who were mired in the horror of the situation.

When my wife of 31 years passed away in 2020, it would have been easy to say I was horrible when people asked me how I was doing. But instead, I tried to reframe the grief I was experiencing into something that would allow me to have a different worldview. I’d answer friends by telling them that it is “one day at a time for me” or, “I’m putting one foot in front of the other.” Feeling horrible was the truth, but I also believed that living in that mental space would not help me through the difficult times. One day at a time, and one foot in front of the other, was the lens I chose to focus on. Even when you feel horrible, words matter.

We live in fearful times. I’ve learned people get frozen by fear or they get focused by fear. I propose that you get “focused by fear”. Focus on a lens that will help you see through the fog of chaos that surrounds you and look for the possible.

Look for the positive. Look for how to reframe your situation so you can deal most effectively with the hand you have been dealt. Choose the lens that you see the world through. And always remember that words matter.

Last month, I was wondering which words best describe the effect of BNI^® on businesses. I decided to share a post on my social media pages requesting for you to reply with your words. I was amazed when I received over 200 words as replies to that question. Therefore, I decided to copy down all the words from the comments shared on my social platforms and save them in a file. After sorting the words alphabetically, I was able to see which of the words were the most common in your replies. I was not surprised to see that five of the seven BNI Core Values were represented as half the top ten most popular words.

The most popular word of all the words received was GROWTH. Our members found that joining BNI resulted in LEARNING how to be a better business owner. They grew both personally with a positive ATTITUDE, and professionally from the RECOGNITION they received. As they SUPPORTED the other members, their own business was being held ACCOUNTABLE too and THRIVING. They were INSPIRED as a result of the COLLABORATION with the members in their chapter, even during the pandemic. The core value of GIVERS GAIN^® is what our BNI members hold dear and incorporate into the culture of their businesses. These are your words to live by.

What is Your Verb?

Asking my followers what is their “one word” reminded me of my blog, “What is Your Verb?”. This blog was about a 2017 presentation from Alex Mandossian about knowing the one word that describes you best. This one word is not a noun or an adjective. The best words to describe you are verbs. According to Alex, verbs increase persuasion power and move people. The greatest thought leaders in history lived their lives as verbs. What is your verb? My verb is “inspire”.

Change your WORDS, Inspire your WORLD…

I explained in my blog, “Change your WORDS, Inspire your WORLD”, why my verb is “inspire”. I want to inspire people. Furthermore, I want to inspire people who inspire people to help others and become “their better selves”. Inspired people are not only motivating themselves, they are also an inspiration to others to perform at their highest potential.

Inspiration starts with changing your words. There is tremendous power in words, in our speech. We use words every day to communicate, to express our feelings and thoughts, but we often forget how powerful they can be and how important it is to choose them with care. Words are how we communicate and it is through our communication that we motivate others. Throughout human history, great leaders have used the inspirational power of words. What are the words that inspire you? These are the words to live by.

The Power of Words

Never underestimate the power of your words, both positive and negative. Your words can unintentionally hurt someone when expressed in a negative tone. However, when you use positive words, you inspire others to change. Your positive words can create a culture of caring. The words we use will provide insight and understanding that will create positive change.

In this video, a blind man sits by a busy city street hoping for some spare change. Beside him is a sign, “I’m Blind. Please Help.” People pass him by without notice until a girl stops and re-words his sign, “It’s a Beautiful Day and I Can’t See It.” Immediately, passersby respond to the man because of the power of words.

Hope is More Powerful than Fear

In my blog, “Hope is More Powerful than Fear”, I explained that we must be careful about the actual words we use. We can foster hope in others by using words of encouragement that create the actions to inspire others. We can choose to have hope, make the most of it, and come out better and stronger. Otherwise, we can choose to be overcome by our fear and feelings of isolation. However, we know that in our times of distress, hearing words of encouragement from others can remove our fear and foster feeling stronger. I choose to be better and stronger. These are the words to live by.

Use positive words of encouragement to change people’s lives for the good. The real power of our words is the result of these words on others. We can change people’s lives for the good with just a few encouraging words of hope. You can change our world and make our world a better place simply with the power of your words.