Tag Archives: litigator

OK, let me start by saying that my real beef is with civil litigators, not all lawyers and though I may use the term “lawyer” in my blog, it is the litigators I am really upset with. I also understand that we need rules of law and people to help guide us through them, such as my colleague here on the Entrepreneur.com Blog Network, Nina Kaufman, who writes the Making it Legal blog (Nina, please don’t hate me . . . for what I’m about to say).

Not all lawyers are litigators. However, all litigators are lawyers and it is that particular group of people that I think have made a mess out of our legal system.

The most outrageous legal cases can make it to court and cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to defend. I recently saw a case where a man decided  NOT to renew his services with a business, then sued the business for the loss of income he incurred by not renewing the service! That’s right. He chose to not renew, then sued because he lost income after not renewing the service! Sounds unbelievable, doesn’t it? Well, to just about any sane person, it is. Unfortunately, litigators can make the most incredible “legal” arguments out of the most outrageous claims, and judges feel compelled to let them go through the system.   Welcome to America!

All of this means that the defendants have to pay thousands–sometimes hundreds of thousands–of dollars to defend these insane claims.

This particular case that I mentioned above dragged on for years in the legal system and cost the defending parties more than $100,000 to defend! The primary defendant refused to settle at any cost. She was not going to buckle to extortion from this guy. However, two of the secondary defendants finally paid a few thousand dollars to make this extortionist and his litigator go away because they couldn’t afford the hundreds of thousands of dollars it would take to have this go all the way through court. The ONLY winner was the litigator.

When I hear stories like this, I can’t help but wonder if Shakespeare got it right in Henry VI when he said the first thing we do is get rid of the lawyers! (OK, I know, that’s not the exact quote but, I don’t want to be sued by someone saying that I was threatening bodily harm to this esteemed group of professionals).

In preparation for writing this blog, I did some research on Shakespeare’s quote and I read one legal website that wrote that Shakespeare’s statement was actually a defense of lawyers because the comment was made by criminals. Therefore they (the criminals) just wanted the “good guys” (the lawyers) out of the way.  Wow, and we wonder why the legal system is a mess. Sorry, only lawyers could argue that the quote from Shakespeare was a compliment!

Well, I believe in solutions and not just describing problems. So here are some possible solutions. First, I believe that there should be mandatory mediation between parties before any lawsuit can ever be filed (the litigators will hate this one)! From personal experience (and contracts that I’ve done), this often works). The problem is, anyone can sue anyone for anything before there is any face-to-face time with a professional mediator. Second, I believe that 100 percent of the time, the losing party should pay the winning party’s legal fees. Furthermore, I think the losing litigator should share in paying this fee! This will make the extortionists and litigators very cautious about the ridiculous lawsuits that are filed.  Watch how many crazy lawsuits cease if the lawyers pushing the process have to pay something if they lose!

Hey, these are only ideas–there may be many better ones out there. I just know one thing. Our legal system is a mess, and it’s going to take a sledgehammer and a lot of work to fix it. What are your recommendations?

OK, I feel better now.  Oh, wait–I forgot something important:

Legal Disclaimer

This disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes and other Acts of God, neglect, damage from improper reading, incorrect line voltage, improper or unauthorized use, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, removal of tag, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom, crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, mudslides, forest fire, or projectile (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, shot, BBs, paintball, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, etc.).

These comments do not reflect the thoughts or opinions of Entrepreneur.com, my company, my friends, or my dogs; don’t quote me on that; don’t quote me on anything. Humor subject to change without notice; resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and coincidental; all models are over 18 years of age; dry clean only; do not bend, fold, or mutilate; anchovies or jalapenos added to jokes upon request; your mileage may vary; no substitutions are allowed; for a limited time only while supplies last; offer void where prohibited;

Do not use if safety seal is broken; do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment; safety goggles may be required during use; call before you dig; use only with proper ventilation; for external use only; if a swelling, redness, rash, or irritation develops, and you don’t discontinue use you totally deserve a swelling, redness, rash, or irritation;

Do not place near a flammable or magnetic source; keep away from open flames; avoid inhaling fumes or contact with mucous membranes. Allow four to six weeks for delivery; if defects are found, do not try to fix them yourself, but return to an authorized joke service center; please remain seated until the jokes have come to a complete stop; jokes in the mirror may be funnier than they appear;

This disclaimer does NOT cover drug overdoses, stress, lawyers of any kind, small bombs, large bombs, sheer stupidity, floods, earthquakes, dangerous streets, dangerous pilots, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, unauthorized repair, improper installation, misuse, typos, misspelled words, missing or altered signatures, and incidents owing to computer or disk failure, accidental file deletions, or milk coming out of your nose due to laughing while drinking; other restrictions may apply.

If something offends you, lighten up, get a life, and move on.