My Advice: Talk ‘TO’ Each Other, Not ‘ABOUT’ Each Otherstring(63) "My Advice: Talk ‘TO’ Each Other, Not ‘ABOUT’ Each Other"

September 28, 2023
Building Relationships, Collaboration, Conversation, Networking, Rant!, Self Development 13

In life, we often find ourselves navigating a complex web of relationships—be it with family, friends, colleagues, or partners. These relationships are built on a foundation of trust, understanding, and effective communication. Over the years, I’ve come to realize that one invaluable lesson stands out above the rest: clear, open, honest, and direct communication with people is the key to solving most problems that may arise in these relationships.

It’s a common scenario in our lives; when faced with a challenge or a disagreement in a relationship, our instinct is to seek solace in talking to others about the issue rather than addressing it with the person directly involved. This tendency can easily lead to the deterioration of relationships, as communication becomes less about resolution and more about venting frustrations or assigning blame. It’s a pattern that many of us fall into, and it’s a pattern that can be highly detrimental.

A wise piece of advice that has stayed with me throughout the years is the notion that when you point your finger at someone else, you have three fingers pointing back at you. This simple yet profound idea highlights the importance of self-reflection and personal responsibility in our relationships. It reminds us that instead of attributing all the problems to others, we should examine our own role and our own contributions to the situation.

The Power of Direct Communication

From personal and professional experiences, I have learned (sometimes the hard way) that the most effective way to strengthen and maintain healthy relationships, particularly those with referral partners, is to engage in direct communication. This means talking “to” each other instead of talking “about” each other. When a problem or challenge arises, the best course of action is to address it head-on, rather than letting it fester and grow through gossip or third-party discussions.

If you find yourself in a situation where you have concerns or issues with someone in your life, I encourage you to take immediate action. Pick up the phone and call them, send an email, or, even better, request a face-to-face meeting. Approach the conversation with the intention of understanding each other’s perspectives and finding a mutually beneficial solution. Remember that the goal is to work collaboratively towards resolving the challenges that have arisen rather than engage in the “blame game”.

Stay Focused on Solutions

Maintaining a “solutions-focused” mindset is paramount in these discussions. Instead of dwelling on past mistakes or trying to pinpoint fault, focus on finding ways to move forward positively. Encourage open dialogue and active listening, as these are the cornerstones of effective communication. By actively seeking solutions and addressing concerns directly, you demonstrate your commitment to the relationship and your willingness to work together to overcome obstacles.

In the context of referral partners, this approach is especially crucial. Referral partnerships are built on trust and mutual support, and they thrive when both parties communicate openly and honestly. When issues or misunderstandings arise, addressing them directly can prevent them from escalating into more significant problems that could damage the partnership.

The power of clear, open, honest, and direct communication cannot be overstated when it comes to maintaining and strengthening relationships. Rather than talking “about” each other, it is essential to talk “to” each other when challenges or conflicts arise. By doing so, we foster an environment of trust, understanding, and collaboration, ultimately ensuring that our relationships remain healthy, resilient, and mutually beneficial. Remember, effective communication is the bridge that leads to resolution, growth, and a more harmonious connection with those around us.

I invite you to tell me about a time in your life when you spoke with someone and resolved the situation OR about a time when you didn’t talk about the issue and the relationship got worse.

Successful Networking In Business

Successful Business Networkingstring(30) "Successful Business Networking"

September 18, 2023
BNI, Business Networking, Networking 1

Let’s talk about the word “networking”. It has become so overused that some business professionals can no longer define it. Many people think that networking is only about going to social mixers or after-work business events, where they shake a few hands, collect some new business cards, and, of course, give away some cards of their own. Sadly, they truly believe that’s all there is to networking. To be fair, we could say that they are engaging in social networking. However, that type of activity should never be confused with business networking.

As the Founder & Chief Visionary officer of BNI® I have seen the definition of business networking change and evolve over the past 38 years. This is my definition of networking:
“Networking is the process of developing and activating your relationships to increase your business, enhance your knowledge, and expand your sphere of influence or serve the community.”

Notice the key word is relationships.

Successful networking of any kind starts with the genuine desire to build relationships for the purpose of giving and receiving business. If someone is only networking to gain and not to give, they will never be successful.

Building Relationships should be one of the most important components of your business. And the best way to do that is by FARMING not by hunting. It is all about cultivating relationships – taking the time and giving the energy to help them grow and flourish. Think like a good farmer does: they know when to tend to their crops and when to harvest them. If you over pick or try to harvest too soon, you’ll be left with nothing. However, if you continue to care for and maintain your crops (and your business relationships), they will grow abundantly and provide bountiful results for you.

Business professionals who are the farming type of networkers go to networking events because of the opportunities to meet new people. They do not use those events as face-to-face cold calling opportunities. They understand the importance of meeting someone and then building a relationship with them. They go well beyond the ‘hunting’ style of meeting people, which is simply adding another name to their contact list.

Build Deep Relationships

I’ve said this for years: If your network is a mile wide and an inch deep, it is not powerful. To maximize your business relationships, you need to go beyond knowing someone’s name, their job, and where they work.  A deep network contains the contacts that you know much more about, and those who usually know much more about you. You want to find out about their family, their interests, their hobbies, their goals. That is how you build a strong, deep network.

Social capital is also an important component of building strong relationships. Social capital is like financial capital. In order to amass financial capital, you have to invest and grow your assets. You need to have money in the bank before you can make a withdrawal. Relationships are very much the same, particularly referral relationships. You must support and help others with their business before you can ask for their help.

Two Views of Business Networking

I have found that businesspeople tend to fall into one of two groups when it comes to their views about networking. For many people, the current mind-set is that networking is a passive business strategy, rather than a proactive marketing tool. This attitude results in a scattered and often ineffective networking approach that consequently wastes the businessperson’s time, and their money. It’s no surprise that when people feel they’ve been wasting their time and money on something, they are understandably not going to want to continue that activity.

On the other hand, some professionals do consider networking a proactive marketing tool for their business. How can you tell? They make it a significant part of their marketing and business plans. They have networking goals. They may even include a budget line item for networking. Most importantly, they practice it and live it every day. They realize that their networking team is there to keep an eye out for potential customers for them. When you “target talk”, that is, when you hone in on exactly what type of client you are looking for, the result will be better, more qualified referrals from your networking partners.

When you have a proactive mindset and attitude about networking, and you focus on building strong, mutually beneficial relationships with like-minded people, you will be well on your way to successful business networking.

 

 

 

Related posts:

Networking – the TRUE Definition

A recent Google search for “what is networking”…

READ MORE

Is Your Network a Mile Wide But an Inch Deep?

Is your personal network deep…

READ MORE

Get The Most Value On Your Business Networking Investment

Get the Most Value for Your Networking Timestring(43) "Get the Most Value for Your Networking Time"

September 7, 2023
BNI, Networking

As the Founder of BNI, an international organization with hundreds of thousands of members globally, I am well aware of how we are sometimes overwhelmed by commitments and obligations. And I know firsthand how important it is to make the most of your time. Have you ever tried to get back an hour you spent on something that didn’t turn out well? It’s absolutely impossible. Since we all know we can’t retrieve an hour, much less a day, of our precious time, we obviously want to spend it as wisely and effectively as we can.

So, if you spent some of your time networking for your business, you would want to get a high return on your networking investment, right? Here are some tips to help you do just that.

1. Be “on” 24/7
Be on the top of your networking game all the time – 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Networking opportunities present themselves in the most unsuspected places and at various times of day. It helps to be prepared. Always have your business cards with you and have your response ready when someone asks you about what you do. Keep it succinct and memorable by giving a brief summary of your business.

2. Learn to play golf or something else
Challenge yourself to learn the game of golf or some other activity that aligns with your skills and interests. It’s true that a lot of business happens on the golf course. And it could just as easily happen on the badminton court, the soccer field or across a pool table. Even during these “fun” activities, always be prepared for networking opportunities.

3. Have purposeful meal meetings
Get more value out of your mealtime by having a meeting that includes a meal and a specific, meaningful purpose such as business networking. These meetings are strategic and results-oriented and can provide high value for your invested time. Remember:

  • It’s not a break from work. It’s a way to build a strong, mutually beneficial relationship with each other.
  • It’s not a time to have three martinis. It’s a time to teach three things about your business to a potential referral partner and learn about theirs.
  • It’s not about trying out and critiquing new restaurants. It’s a way to help a colleague solve their problems.

4. First impressions count
Make sure you get off to a good start. Begin by taking a closer look at your appearance and your body language. Are they helping you start productive conversations? Or ending them before you can even say a word? Dress appropriately, smile when you meet someone, and maintain eye contact. Be relaxed and comfortable rather than rigid with your arms crossed. Always maintain a positive attitude.

5. Seek out a referral networking group and join a chamber of commerce
If you’re going to venture out and build a network, the first steps should be to seek out a referral networking group and a chamber of commerce to help network your business. These are strong interprofessional groups where participants typically get the majority of their business through referrals. Visit a few groups to get a feel for them and be selective when you make your commitments.

6. Sponsor and/or host select events
Find out how you can leverage sponsorship opportunities and specific events to position your business in front of key people. Of course, you need to take the initiative to do the research and make it happen. Hosting a successful business mixer can also be a powerful tool for fostering connections and expanding your professional network.

When you implement these strategies, you can strengthen your network and get more return on your business networking investment. You also increase your visibility within the community and, most importantly, you get the most value from the time you spend networking.

 

 

 

Related Blog Posts:

Why You Need a Unique Selling Proposition

When someone asks you what you…

READ MORE

The 12 x 12 x 12 Rule for Networking

Do you want your business networking…

READ MORE

Story Of Wallflower Experience At Networking Event

Look for the Wallflowersstring(24) "Look for the Wallflowers"

September 4, 2023
BNI, Networking 1

I was talking about networking with a good friend of mine, Dr. Mark Goulston (a well-known psychiatrist and consultant), some time ago, and he said, “People should always introduce themselves to the wallflower in the room.  Nobody attends a networking event wanting to stay in a corner and be left alone. They’re in that corner because the most technically skilled people are often socially shy. You never know when you’ll meet the next Bill Gates.”

This comment really resonated with me, and it reminded me of a time a few years ago when I was at a party put on by Virgin Galactic relating to the testing of White Knight Two and SpaceShip Two. I walked outside the party and looked over in the corner by the pool where I saw a man standing by himself looking uncomfortable and very much out of his element. Then I noticed who it was. It was the legendary Burt Rutan, Founder of Scaled Composites, and designer of the SpaceShipTwo! He was by himself at a party with hundreds of people celebrating the work of the company he founded as well as Virgin Galactic.

This was an opportunity I could not pass up. So, I went up and introduced myself to him.  I asked him if he went to many of these events, and he said, “Counting this one – that would be one.”  I asked him why he decided to go to this one, and he said, “Because Richard asked me to come.”  By the way, that would be – Richard Branson, the Founder of Virgin Galactic.

Although he didn’t seem very outgoing in this setting, he did seem good with having a conversation, so I pushed on. I said to him, “It must be incredible to see this amazing, long-term vision come to fruition.” He nicely replied, “This isn’t my long-term vision of what the company can do.”  I’m sure I was visibly surprised as I asked him, “What’s your long-term vision?”  He said, “Well, I believe the company can push forward past sub-orbital flights and expand to allow space tourists to do orbital flights around the earth.”  I naively said, “That’s an amazing long-term vision.” He replied, “That’s not my long-term vision.”  I was really surprised and said, “Okay, what’s your long-term vision?”  He replied that he felt “the company could provide orbital flights to passengers who could then stay at a hotel in space for a short period of time.” At this point, I’m completely blown away, and I once again said, “That’s an amazing, long-term vision,” and, yet again, he said, “That’s not my long-term vision.” At this point I’m all in, and I’m completely fascinated with this visionary, so I again asked, “What’s your long-term vision?” He replied, “I believe we can launch flights into orbit, stay at a hotel in space, and then take flights around the moon and back – that’s my long-term vision.”

Burt was probably in his late 60’s when we had this conversation, and I asked him one final question, “When do you think that vision can become a reality?” And he replied, “I think it can be done in my lifetime.”

The British have a term for what I felt at that moment – “gobsmacked.” I was utterly astounded by this man’s vision, and I was incredibly honored to have had this opportunity to talk with him.

I founded the largest referral networking organization in the world, and I’ve met tens of thousands of people during my tenure in BNI. I can easily say that this was one of the most interesting conversations I ever had with someone at a party or networking event. Burt Rutan’s (and, of course, Richard Branson’s) vision of what can be done through their entrepreneurial efforts has left an indelible mark on me.

The important lesson here relates to Dr. Goulston’s belief that we should always look for the “wallflowers” in the room. Not everyone of them will be a “Burt Rutan” but I’ve found that most of them are interesting and well worth the conversation. Just every now and then, you might meet a Bill Gates or a Burt Rutan, and that makes the effort of finding those wallflowers worth it.

Do you have a story to share about talking with someone who was alone at a networking event? Or have you had your own “wallflower” experience when someone came over to talk with you at a meeting or event?

 

 

 

Photo courtesy of:
“File:Burt Rutan – Cropped.JPG” by Steve Paluch is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0.

tips for successful business

Tips for Hosting a Successful Business Mixerstring(44) "Tips for Hosting a Successful Business Mixer"

August 28, 2023
BNI, Innovation, Networking 1

Hosting a successful business mixer can be a powerful tool for fostering connections and expanding your professional network. While it might seem like a challenging endeavor, you’ll be okay if you remember that your primary purpose is to facilitate networking. With that in mind, I offer eight tips that can contribute to the effectiveness of your business mixer.

1. Strategic Planning

Start planning the event at least eight weeks ahead of time. This window allows you to effectively invite a diverse range of guests, ensuring a healthy mix of professionals attending. You can also encourage potential attendees to donate door prizes to enhance engagement.

2. Optimal Venue Selection

If your office space or building is sizable enough, consider hosting the mixer at your place of business. This provides exposure to your workspace and also creates a casual and comfortable environment for networking. Make sure that the venue you select has is easily accessible and has enough parking for the attendees.

3. Showcase Products and Services

Dedicate specific areas that are marked with clear signs for attendees to display information about their products and services. This encourages interactive conversations and information exchange among participants OR the networkers.

4. Designate a Welcoming Committee

Appoint a group of “Visitor Hosts” who will warmly greet arriving guests. Name tags should be prepared for everyone, ensuring that each guest completes theirs properly. To encourage a dynamic networking environment, limit the availability of chairs by only having very few in the room. This will prompt people to actively mingle.

5. Engage in Networking Exercises

Kickstart the mixer with a brief networking activity. This could involve participants meeting three new individuals or finding someone in a related field to discuss their most effective networking strategies. These icebreakers cultivate meaningful interactions.

6. Innovative Mixer Ideas

Add excitement to your event by incorporating innovative concepts. For instance, organize a “Meet Your (Business) Match” session where attendees with similar professional backgrounds gather in designated zones (examples: finance, real estate, health care). Alternatively, you can introduce a fun twist by having guests draw cards with the names of famous duos, encouraging them to find their “partner” during networking (examples: Romeo – Juliet, Mickey Mouse – Minnie Mouse, Lois Lane – Clark Kent, Han Solo – Princess Leia, John Lennon – Paul McCartney).

7. Stay Focused on Networking

Focus on the primary purpose and fundamental objective of facilitating networking throughout the event. While it might be tempting to take the spotlight with speeches or presentations, remember that keeping the atmosphere conducive to connections is the priority.

8. Efficient Closing

When concluding the mixer, allocate around ten minutes for introductions and door prize distribution. Briefly acknowledge everyone and express gratitude for their participation, reinforcing the networking aspect of the event. Remember to start the event on time and to end on time.

The success of a business mixer lies in your ability to foster an environment where professionals can engage, share insights, and create valuable connections. By adhering to these tips, you can establish an event that can benefit your own business and provides a platform for others to expand their networks and collaborate effectively.

Remember, the core focus should always be on networking, and by prioritizing this objective, you will be well on your way to hosting a successful business mixer.

If you have hosted networking mixers before and have additional tips to offer, or if you have an interesting story to tell about your experience with hosting a mixer, please share it in the comments section.

 

 

 

Related Blog Posts:

Ten Tips for Success at a Networking Mixer

Some people get nervous…

READ MORE

The Power of the VCP Process®

A psychologist once walked around a room while teaching a stress…

READ MORE

helping in business networking

When Networking, Ask “How Can I Help?”string(42) "When Networking, Ask “How Can I Help?”"

August 14, 2023
BNI, Building Relationships, Networking 3

Wherever you live in the world, Givers Gain® is the Number 1 rule to remember when networking. Always be thinking, “How can I help this person?” 

After all, business networking is about building relationships, and helping others is absolutely the best way to begin the relationship-building process.

Where to Begin?

In most social interactions, the common question is usually, “How’s everything going?” The typical response is often something like, “Great, things couldn’t be better.” This standard answer is often given as a gesture of courtesy because most people are aware that sharing their troubles might not be suitable for casual conversations. However, this automatic response seldom reveals the entire picture.

In reality, there is always room for improvement, and there are many ways that you can extend a helping hand. However, most individuals are reluctant to delve into specifics or disclose their challenges, particularly at social or networking events. To unveil genuine insights, avoid generalities like, “How are things?” Instead, ask more specific questions that dig a bit deeper.

For instance, if someone tells you things are going great, perhaps sharing that their business is thriving and surpassing their expectations, you can ask, “Are you successfully meeting all of your goals?” Even if the response is affirmative, this is still a big opportunity to help.

Consider this: It’s a business that is expanding faster than the owner had projected.
What potential support might it need?

By going beyond surface-level exchanges and genuinely understanding someone’s unique needs, you gain the ability to identify introductions that could prove beneficial for them and their situation. However, you can only figure out what introductions to make after getting past the generalities and finding out their specific needs.

Ways to Help Others

While many people think of networking solely as a channel for acquiring clients, embracing the Givers Gain mindset redefines it as a powerful tool for establishing relationships. The act of extending help introduces an avenue for building meaningful connections. Your assistance can come in a variety of ways. Here are some examples:
Making Introductions
Linking someone to individuals within your network can lead to profound outcomes. These connections can foster mutual appreciation and open doors for potential collaborations.

Sharing Knowledge
Providing industry insights, articles relevant to their business, or valuable resources underscores your willingness to contribute to someone else’s growth. Perhaps you can share something from your profession, such as an upcoming change in procedures that will affect them.

Skill Exchange
Sharing your areas of expertise or skills can be an impactful contribution to the success of others. Often, what may seem like a small thing to give can be of huge significance to the receiver.

Problem Solving
Helping someone in the resolution of business challenges they are experiencing demonstrates your ability to navigate complex issues. This can include giving tips on how to initiate the changes they will need to make to resolve the situation.

Mentorship
Offering guidance and mentorship can be invaluable to someone’s personal and professional development, including your own. I have found that every time I was a mentor to someone, it was also a learning experience for me, and I realized that I was improving myself while helping them.

Helping Builds Trust

When you embrace the Givers Gain philosophy, networking can go beyond transactional exchanges that are focused solely on getting a new customer. Instead, it becomes a way to build authentic and meaningful business relationships.

When you help someone in any way that serves their needs, you will begin a professional relationship with them, and creating a relationship helps build trust. Trust is the cornerstone of effective networking. When you practice Givers Gain often enough, you will be on the road to a powerful personal network predicated on trust that is built through helping someone else.

By genuinely aiming to assist others, you solidify a reputation as a valuable resource and a trusted collaborator. This embodies the true essence of business networking: fostering connections that enrich the lives of all parties involved.

The Number 1 networking rule, maintaining an attitude of, “How can I help this person?”, is the most effective way to build mutually beneficial relationships. Simply put, helping equals opportunity.

Six Ways to Use Networking to Find a Jobstring(40) "Six Ways to Use Networking to Find a Job"

August 3, 2023
BNI, Find a Job, Networking

As job markets continue to evolve, networking remains a powerful tool for finding employment opportunities. More than 80% of all jobs are found through networking according to a LinkedIn study. So, I thought I would share some ideas about how both recent graduates and seasoned professionals can find a new position.
Here are six networking steps that can help someone who is looking for a job.

1.Cultivate a Confident Mindset

Desperation is not referable. Approach networking with confidence, rather than desperation. You will be depending on your network to vouch for you and speak highly of you to their hiring manager and their contacts, so confidently showcase your skills and abilities.

2.Curate Your Online Presence

Ensure that all of your social media accounts project a professional image. Potential employers often review online profiles, so make sure yours reflects positively on you; you don’t want to make your network look bad if they recommend you.
I once checked out the Facebook page of someone I was considering hiring. OMG! There were excessive swearwords in most of his posts, along with many inappropriate comments and tirades about people. He was not the kind of influence I wanted in my office.

3.Leverage Existing Relationships

Start by connecting with friends, family and business contacts, both in person and on platforms like LinkedIn. Communicate your job search goals, telling them exactly what kind of position you’re looking for. Ask them to keep an eye out for suitable openings.

4.Tap Into Diverse Contacts

Expand your network beyond your immediate circles and connections. Reach out to neighbors, professional organizations, past clients, and community groups for additional contacts. Sometimes, even weak ties can lead to valuable job referrals.

5.Categorize Your Contacts

Assess the nature of your relationships – active, passive, or dormant, and then tailor your approach accordingly. This is my strategy to approach each of them.
Active – pick up the phone and ask for assistance. You have a relationship with them; most likely, they will love to help you.
Passive – set an appointment to reconnect with them, preferably in person. Find out about them and how they’re doing and let them know you’re looking for something.
Dormant – reconnect through social media or email. Just talk. Don’t ask for anything – yet. Stay in touch and gradually build the relationship before you ask.

6.Network In-Person

Engage in face-to-face networking by visiting companies in the industry you are interested in. Check in with the front desk, drop off your resume, and ask to meet with the HR director. Even better, find out if someone in your network can connect you to a current employee in that company.

Once you get a referral or a great connection, do these two things.

Research the Prospective Employer

Prepare thoroughly before interviews. Learn about the company’s history, their corporate culture and values, and any recent news or latest press releases – whatever you can find. Checking out their website is only the start. Research the organization to get more information. If possible, research the interviewers to gain insights into their professional backgrounds.

I landed one of the biggest jobs of my career (before starting BNI and long before Google) because I researched the company and knew so much about the organization and the professional background of the person interviewing me that it blew him away and he hired me.

Offer a “Working Interview”

Suggest a “working interview” to showcase your talents and work ethic. It is a great way for a company to take your experience for a “test drive.” It will give you an opportunity to show them what you’re made of. This approach allows employers to assess your suitability for the role in a practical manner. If all goes well, ask them to consider you for the position. A successful “working interview” can lead to immediate job offers.

I have been recommending this to job-seekers for many years. I once suggested this idea to my eldest daughter. She tried it out with a company she wanted to work for, and they took her up on the “working interview” offer. She did such a great job, they hired her the next day!

Networking remains an indispensable approach for job seekers across all career states. By following these steps and integrating the strategies, you can navigate the competitive job market with greater confidence and increased chances of success. Share this with someone you know who is looking for employment.

Has networking helped you find a job? I’d love to hear your experience; share in the comments below.

 

 

 

Related Blog Post:

Five tips for new college graduates to find a job through networking

It’s graduation season. However, the majority of…

READ MORE

Business Networking is a Marathon, Not a Sprintstring(47) "Business Networking is a Marathon, Not a Sprint"

May 22, 2023
BNI, Credibility, Networking 2

In the world of professional relationships and business growth, networking plays a pivotal role. As the founder of BNI®, an organization built on the foundation of networking, I have witnessed firsthand the transformative power it holds. Networking is not merely a sprint to collect business cards and make quick connections; rather, it is a marathon that requires patience, perseverance, and the cultivation of genuine relationships. Today, we will explore why networking is more of a marathon than a sprint, embodying the principles and philosophy I have advocated throughout my career.

Building Authentic Relationships

Networking is about building authentic relationships, not just accumulating contacts. It is essential to invest time and effort in getting to know others on a deeper level. Building rapport, trust, and a genuine connection requires a commitment to long-term relationship building. Like a marathon runner training to endure the miles, networking calls for consistent engagement and follow-up with others, nurturing connections that go beyond the surface level.

Establishing Credibility and Trust

A successful networker understands the significance of establishing credibility and trust within their professional community. This is not something that can be achieved overnight; it requires consistent effort and demonstrating reliability over time. By consistently showing up, delivering on promises, and providing value to others, one can establish themselves as a trusted resource and expert in their field. This reputation cannot be built hastily; it is cultivated over the course of a marathon networking journey.

The Power of Referrals

Referrals are the lifeblood of successful business networking. However, they are not instant gratification. Similar to the stamina required to complete a marathon, it takes time and a solid network foundation to earn referrals. As connections grow stronger and trust deepens, individuals become more willing to recommend your services or products to people they know. Referrals flow naturally when relationships have been nurtured and when others are confident in your abilities. This process cannot be rushed; it evolves steadily as your network expands and your reputation spreads.

The Depth of Connection

While a sprint may be a quick burst of energy, networking thrives on the depth of connection. It is not about the number of connections one can acquire in a short period; it is about the quality and depth of those relationships. By taking the time to truly understand others, their needs, and aspirations, one can offer genuine support and be a valuable resource to them. This depth of connection allows for collaboration, partnerships, and long-term business opportunities that are often missed in a sprint.

Patience and Long-Term Vision

Networking is a journey that requires patience and a long-term vision. It takes time to develop a network of trusted individuals who believe in your mission and are willing to support you. Like a marathon runner, there will be times when progress seems slow, and the finish line feels distant. However, by staying committed, consistent, and focused, networking will yield invaluable rewards that a sprint can never provide.

 

Business networking is undeniably more of a marathon than a sprint. It necessitates dedication, perseverance, and the cultivation of authentic relationships built on trust and credibility. By understanding that networking is a long-term endeavor, we can appreciate the true power it holds in creating opportunities, fostering collaborations, and ultimately achieving professional success. So, let us lace up our networking shoes, embrace the marathon, and forge lasting connections that will propel us forward on our journey to success.

 

 

 

Related Blog Posts:

Working Together

The idea of working together to achieve better results is a concepts…

READ MORE

Is Your Network a Mile Wide But an Inch Deep?

Is your personal network deep or shallow…

READ MORE

Business Networking and Friendsstring(31) "Business Networking and Friends"

April 13, 2023
BNI, Business Networking, Networking

I have found that one of the strengths of a good networking group is that most of the members become friends. Ironically, one of the weaknesses in networking groups is that most of the members become friends. Yes, it’s both a strength and a weakness. Accountability is crucial in running a good network because friends don’t like to hold friends accountable. I have also found that people who truly understand business networking recognize the need to have a system and structure to get results.

It can be dangerously easy for a networking group that meets regularly to become a talk session over coffee with little or no networking taking place. That is what happens when the group loses sight of their purpose, their focus, system, and structure – or it happens if they never had any of those things to begin with.

Often, people begin to make up their own agendas and they lose their focus on networking. When you lose focus, the meetings become social. Networking should be about business. Of course, there will be a social aspect, but it’s mainly about business, commitment, and accountability.

Leadership and Teaching

People can be like water – taking the path of least resistance. Without the proper framework in which to operate, the agenda might become the current topic of the day’s news, or it ends up being whatever the person running the group thinks the meeting should be from their own personal perspective. Inconsistency like that, over time, is a problem for a networking group.

Even if the group has a good, strong leader, that person’s life will change at some point or maybe they will simply get burned out. The problem starts if there is nobody else to teach. Teaching is a leaky-bucket process. You begin with a full bucket of information. When that information is taught to someone else, some of it leaks out of the bucket and the people being taught get a limited version of the information. Then, when that person teaches someone else, the material continues to get watered down based on their personal understanding and their ability to articulate the material.

By the time you are in the third or fourth generation of people passing along the information, you only have about half a bucket remaining. When the bucket of information gets low, people start putting in their own content. The problem is that it might not be good content. I’ve seen this time and time again. By the way, very rarely does the material improve over time with the leaky bucket process.

I learned early on that the best solution is to write everything down to develop “train the trainer” material so there is consistency in the system and the way the training is conducted. Making the leadership training part of a replicable system is the best way to fill the leaks and have good leaders for the organization.

I think it is a beautiful thing when people in a networking group become close friends. The key is to make sure it doesn’t detract from the group’s goal of building each other’s business through networking and referrals.

It is important for ALL networking groups to ensure that there is a strong sense of purpose with a solid structure, and that each member is committed to carrying out the systems for networking which are already in place. This will ensure that members agree to be accountable with their business networking friends.

How does your networking group maintain its focus and commitment to systematic networking practices? I’d love to hear your thoughts – leave a comment below.  

What Kind of Man Do I Want to Be?string(33) "What Kind of Man Do I Want to Be?"

April 10, 2023
, Accountability, BNI, Networking, Recognition

I was recently talking to a good friend and fellow member of the Transformational Leadership Council, Bettie Spruill.  We were talking about relationships and she asked me “what kind of man do I want to be?”  I thought that was a great question and I decided to write this blog on that topic.

I want to be a man who lives his values and treats others accordingly.  Living my values is an important aspect of having a fulfilled and meaningful life. For me, my values are fundamental to my identity.  They shape my beliefs, priorities, and behaviors. I want to be a man who lives his values and I strive to embody those values in all aspects of my life. My values include Givers Gain, a positive attitude, recognition, accountability, traditions, innovation, building relationships, and lifelong learning. I’ve incorporated all of these into my company, BNI.

The philosophy of Givers Gain is a value that I hold dearly. I believe that when we give to others, we ultimately receive more in return. This value is particularly relevant in my professional life, where networking and building relationships are essential for success. By giving to others, whether it is time, resources, or knowledge, I can build stronger connections and foster a sense of reciprocity.

Maintaining a positive attitude is another critical value for me. I believe that a positive outlook can have a profound impact on our overall well-being and our interactions with others. By maintaining a positive attitude, I can approach challenges with a sense of optimism and resilience, and inspire others to do the same. Additionally, a positive attitude can create a more welcoming and inclusive environment, where everyone feels valued and supported.

Recognition is a value that is important to me, both in my personal and professional life. I believe that acknowledging the efforts and achievements of others is essential for building strong relationships and fostering a sense of appreciation. By recognizing the contributions of others, we can build a culture of gratitude and respect, where everyone feels seen and valued. Recognition also aligns with my belief in the importance of building strong relationships, as it helps to create a sense of trust and mutual respect.

Accountability is another critical value for me. I believe that taking ownership of our actions and decisions is essential for personal growth and development. The older I get the less I believe in words and the more I believe in behaviors.  By holding ourselves accountable, we can learn from our mistakes and make meaningful changes that benefit ourselves and others.

Traditions are a value that is important to me, particularly in my personal life. I believe that honoring our cultural and organizational traditions can provide connection and belonging and help us to maintain a sense of identity and purpose. Additionally, traditions can help to create a sense of continuity and stability, particularly during times of change or uncertainty.

Innovation is a value that is important to me, particularly in my professional life. I believe that embracing new ideas and approaches can lead to more creative and effective solutions to complex problems. Innovation brings excitement and motivation, as we explore new possibilities and push beyond our boundaries.

Building relationships is a value that is essential for me, both personally and professionally. I believe that cultivating strong connections with others is essential for personal and professional growth and can provide a sense of support and community. By building relationships, we can learn from others, share knowledge and resources, and gain a sense of belonging.

Lifelong learning is a value that is fundamental to my identity. I believe that learning is a lifelong process, and that we can always strive to become better versions of ourselves. By embracing a growth mindset, we can approach challenges with an attitude of curiosity and openness, and use each experience as an opportunity for learning and development. Additionally, lifelong learning aligns with my values of accountability and innovation, as it involves being open to feedback and exploring new ideas and approaches.

Living our values is essential for leading a fulfilling and meaningful life. My values of Givers Gain, positive attitude, recognition, accountability, traditions, innovation, building relationships, and lifelong learning are fundamental to who I am, and they guide my behavior in all aspects of my life.

By striving to live my values and treating others accordingly, I hope to inspire other people to do the same and create a positive impact on the world around me. I believe that when we align our values with our actions, we can create a life of purpose, fulfillment, and joy. It is my goal to continue to live my values and always strive to be the best version of myself so I can positively impact those around me.

That is the kind of man I want to be.

 

 

 

Related Blog Posts:

What Are Your Values?

Your values shape you and your career decisions more than you may realize…

READ MORE

In a previous blog, What is Your Verb?, I stated that my verb is inspire.

Your values shape you and your career…

READ MORE

Don’t Pitch!string(14) "Don’t Pitch!"

March 20, 2023
BNI, Networking, Success

One of the most important things to remember when you are networking is:
Don’t Pitch 

During my recent visit to Necker Island, my friend, Mike Macedonio, and I talked about Networking Up, which is an idea that he came up with a few years back. You need to identify who are the successful people (however you define success) that you want to know, and find a way to network with those people.

Well, Mike and I saw several examples of people doing it wrong; they were trying to pitch a sale or idea to the owner of the island, Richard Branson.

Watch this short video to see more:

 

When you are Networking Up, don’t sell to people! You may think, “I’ll never have another chance.” Well, I guarantee you’ll never have another chance if you pitch anyone, especially the first time you meet them.
Instead, connect with people and find common ground. It changes everything.

1 2 3 … 70