Book Archives - Dr. Ivan Misner®
Entrepreneur

Through the Eyes of a New Entrepreneur

What was going through your mind when you first decided to become an entrepreneur? To many of us it exciting, amazing, confusing, overwhelming, and frightening. You did not know what to do. However, that was a long time ago. Now, you believe that was the best decision you made.

It may be over 10 years for you since you first became an entrepreneur, but is the first few weeks for a new entrepreneur.  Think about what you know now and think back to the things you wish you had known then.

The same thing occurs with business networking

It may be years for you since you first started business networking, but is the first few weeks for a new entrepreneur who has recently joined a networking group like BNI. Therefore, I want you to take a moment and see “networking” through the eyes of a new member. Think about what you know now and think back to the things you wish you had known then.

That’s the reason I wrote “The Networking Mentor”

I have a newly revised book, “The Networking Mentor”, that is available on Amazon. “The Networking Mentor” is a parable about the transformation of someone’s life because another person took them under their wing and mentored them relating to the do’s and don’ts of networking. It starts with a struggling business owner, Ken, who is invited to a BNI networking group by a business associate. He proceeds to mentor Ken and helps him learn how to network effectively and build a referral-based business. Ken’s mentor teaches him very specific strategies on how to network better and at the same time, the mentor improves his skill set as well.

I wanted people to remember by writing this book, the concerns, fears, and frustrations when they first became an entrepreneur and started business networking with others.  Most importantly, I wanted to show how a mentor can make a HUGE difference in someone’s life. Volunteer to be a business networking mentor and you will also become a better networker. You will improve your game; you will improve your skill set.

We all have someone in our story. However, whose story are you in? At your next meeting connect with a new member.  Take them under your wing.  Teach them what you’ve learned and be in their story.

Please review this book

If you read my book. “The Networking Mentor”, I’d really appreciate if you would post a review on Amazon using this link. https://tinyurl.com/reviewsofthenetworkingmentor

For everyone who does a review of “The Networking Mentor”, we will send them a link to a one hour webinar that I did on Who’s in Your Network. It is a free gift for anyone who helps me out by posting a review. After posting your review, please send me a private message letting us know you posted a review. We will reply with a link to the recorded webinar.

Networking Mentor

The Networking Mentor

 

I have a newly revised book, The Networking Mentor, that is now available on Amazon. It was just released this week!

“The Networking Mentor” is a parable about the transformation of someone’s life because another person took them under their wing and mentored them relating to the do’s and don’ts of networking. It starts with a struggling business owner, Ken, who is invited to a BNI networking group by a business associate. He proceeds to mentor Ken and helps him learn how to network effectively and build a referral-based business. Ken’s mentor teaches him very specific strategies on how to network better and at the same time, the mentor improves his skill set as well.

Each and every one of us have people in our lives who made a difference. We all have someone in our story who influenced the path we took—or perhaps motivated us to carve our own path. These are the mentors we’ve had in our life. Their impact can be life-changing. We firmly believe in the power of mentors to make a positive difference in the lives of others. By devoting time and attention to a mentoring relationship, both parties reap deeply powerful and meaningful rewards that extend well beyond simple financial gain. As we mature and gain more experience, we have the opportunity to transition from mostly being a mentee to also being a mentor. This book is for both mentors and mentees. This book is the second edition of a book originally titled: “I Love Networking.” It has been expanded with additional chapters and graphics.

Please use this link to order your own copy of this amazing book.

https://tinyurl.com/TheNetworkingMentor

Every person that believes in mentoring new members in their network needs copies of this book. It is the story of how a mentoring relationship changed someone’s life in a BNI group. We’ve all had mentors who are in “our story”. When we talk about how our life has changed through our experiences with them, they are part of that story. Mentors can make a positive difference in someone’s life. By devoting time and attention to a mentoring relationship, both parties reap deeply powerful and meaningful rewards that extend well beyond simple financial gain. As we gain more experience, we have the opportunity to transition from being a mentee to also being a mentor. We’ve all had mentors who are in “our story”. However, there is something even more important: The real question is not who’s in our story but whose story are we in? Whose life have we made a difference in? That’s what creates a meaningful life, and that’s why this book is for both mentees and mentors.

So, I have two questions for you.  Whose story are you in as their mentor and how have you helped someone else?  Who is in your story as a special mentor to you in your life or business? Share your story here on my blog.  I’d really like to hear it.  Post it below in the comments.

Honor the Event

Honor the Event

Networking is a lifestyle you need to incorporate into everything that you do. However, I also believe that you must HONOR THE EVENT. For example, networking at a chamber mixer is one thing, while networking at a church social is completely different.

What is Networking

I believe that networking is part of the process of developing your social capital. Building your social capital hinges on the development of meaningful relationships with other people. Since one should always be working on building meaningful relationships with other people, they should always be networking. However, that doesn’t mean someone should always be trying to “sell” something to someone, because that rarely facilitates the development of meaningful relationships. Herein lies the misinterpretation of the practice of networking. Some people think that networking means to be constantly “selling” your products or services.

To me, networking means that you should be constantly building relationships. The best way to build relationships is to help someone whenever possible. A good networker has two ears and one mouth and should be using them proportionately. Hence, if you understand networking to be the process that one uses to develop relationships and build one’s social capital – then it makes sense that someone should be networking everywhere – including the Church social. They key is that you must “honor the event”.

Honor the Event

Your networking must be different in a chamber meeting compared to a social event. In both cases you want to be making contacts, putting people together, helping others and building relationships. However, you should NOT be actively promoting your business in one of those two groups (hint – it’s not the Chamber). Instead, you want to focus on putting people together and helping others portion of the process.

Let me give you an example of what I mean:

Last year, I had the opportunity to attend a formal dinner put on by the “Friendly Sons of St. Patrick.” This was a black-tie social event, NOT a business networking dinner. Yet, I was able to make a great contact that ended up being immensely successful for me (and, I hope, for one of the people I met there!). At my table were seated a prominent senior partner to a major international law firm, a former member of the Beach Boys, and Buzz Aldrin. He was part of the first mission to set foot on the moon and now an entrepreneur as the founder of the ShareSpace Program! During the course of the evening, I mentioned to Dr. Aldrin that I was working on my book, Masters of Success. He’s certainly attained a well-known level of success and has some very strong feelings about the future of the space program so I thought he might be interested in sharing his thoughts in this new book. After getting to know each other better, I asked him if he would be interested in contributing a chapter to the book. He was! Consequently, he was one of the prominent contributing authors to the book.

So you can see that it is desirable to keep your networking goals in sight at all events and opportunities, without becoming a networking vulture, or someone that everyone else runs from when they see you coming! Honor the event; tailor your networking strategies so that you fit in without being tuned out.

Mentor

One Time, One Meeting

My daughter, Cassie (AKA Dorian Prin – professional name), is a graphic designer and she’s working on the cover of my next book: The Networking Mentor.  I’m including a “sneak peek” of the working graphic for the cover of the book here in this article.

I was talking to Dorian about the paragraph below which is excerpted from the book:

We’ve all had mentors who are in “our story.” When we talk about how our life has changed through our experiences with them, they are part of that story. However, there is something even more important: The real question is not who’s in our story but whose story are we in? Whose life have we made a difference in? That’s what creates a meaningful life, and that’s why this book is for both mentees and mentors.

In our conversation I mentioned that sometimes you might meet someone only once but that meeting is so profound, it can have an influence on you for the rest of your life.

一期一会

Dorian spent some time in Japan and can speak the language.  She said the Japanese have a saying that relates to this concept.  She said the Japanese phrase is: 一期一会 (ichi go ichi e).  Its direct translation is “one time, one meeting” but it probably can be translated more accurately as “once in a lifetime meeting” and is about the cultural concept of the importance of the unrepeatable nature of connections between people who meet. It is a Buddhist concept specifically tied to the tea ceremony and was the topic of contemplation for the tea ceremony she once participated in during one of her visits to Japan.

The lesson here is that you never know how the things you say may influence someone else.  Even if you only meet them once.  An off-handed comment can have a profound effect (either good or bad) on the person you are talking to.

So, I have a question for you.  What has someone said to you that profoundly affected you in business OR in life?  Share your story here on my blog.  I’d really like to hear it.  Post it below in the comments.

Boundaries

Setting Boundaries in Life

To manage your room effectively, you need to establish boundaries on what behaviors you will or will not tolerate from other people. Furthermore, by building your mental walls, you will be clearer about the kind of behavior you expect from others. However, it will be easy for you to become a pushover if you do not do this. Many people are unaware of other people’s limits and will force their behaviors on you if you do not stand your ground.

Behavioral Disruption

When you set your boundaries, you can use a strategy called behavioral disruption. Behavioral disruption starts with communication, not confrontation. Clear, open, honest, and direct communication is almost always the best way to address issues, and applying this to managing your room is no exception. With behavioral disruption, your goal is to disrupt the process that allows your deal-breakers to be violated. Speak with the person about the issue. Then, share what your response will be the next time one of your deal-breakers is broken. Therefore, when the person crosses your boundaries, remove yourself.

In conclusion, you don’t have to subject yourself to drama anymore. This can be a life-changing experience. Therefore, if you do the work, set boundaries and trust the process. You’ll be glad you did.

This is the premise behind the newest book, “Who’s in Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life” by Ivan Misner, Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio. To order the book, please use this link:https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom

Harmony

Bringing Harmony to Your Room

Psychologists and therapists largely agree that awareness is curative. In this vein, we believe you likely won’t be able to have harmony in your room if you aren’t aware of the people and activities that bring you deep satisfaction.

To bring harmony to your room, find a place where you can sit in silence for a while. Have a pen and paper handy. We suggest you do not use a computer for this, as there is something about the process of writing in your own hand that brings additional depth to the process. You may find it helpful to gently close your eyes and focus your awareness on the process of your breathing for a while. Then begin to review the moments throughout your life when you felt most alive.

Ask yourself:

  • What am I doing when I feel most alive? Who am I with?
  • When am I enjoying myself so much that I lose track of time?
  • What do I look forward to doing the most?
  • What makes me feel fulfilled and satisfied?
  • When have I felt the proudest? Who was I with?

The goal here is simple harmony:

Identify the people, activities, and projects in your life that make you feel alive, satisfied, or fulfilled. To take this exercise a step farther, you can also write a paragraph about each activity that gives you a sense of aliveness. What does that look like? Describe each activity as vividly as possible, and take some time to think through what it would look like to experience each activity more fully—and more frequently. You might be surprised what you discover

Next, strive to say yes to more of the people and things that bring you fulfillment and a sense of aliveness, and strive to say no to the people and things that add stress and conflict within your room. When you consciously design your room, it is much easier to live a life of harmony.

This is the premise behind the newest book, “Who’s in Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life” by Ivan Misner, Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio. To order the book, please use this link: https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom

Audible

“Who’s in Your Room?” is Now Available as an Audible Original Audiobook

Your New Years just got a whole lot better. Now, you have an effortless and affordable way to enjoy “Who’s in Your Room?” in audio. I am so thrilled to offer you the opportunity to enjoy my latest book seamlessly through Audible, it’s about to become your new favorite audiobook.

  • The audiobook is narrated by the authors: Ivan MisnerStewart EmeryRick Sapio
  • Listen in your car on the way to your BNI meeting, relaxing on vacation, or at the gym during your New Year’s workout.
Below is the link for the Audible audio-book on Amazon!
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Make a “revolution” instead of a “resolution”

Can you imagine living a better life in 2019? Would you like to surround yourself with more supportive people? There’s hope! You see, the quality of your life depends on the people in your life. The simple and powerful ideas in this book can change your life forever in the new year.

“Who’s in Your Room?” introduces you to the concept of your life being like a room – a room where anyone who enters affects your life…forever. Although this concept may sound frightening, this book gives you the tools and exercises you need to make a New Year’s resolution to take control of your room and live the life you desire in 2019.

So, head over to Audible now to pick your first Audible Original. After all, there’s nothing better to read — or listen to — for the new year than “Who’s in Your Room?”. If you’re still not convinced on the book, take a listen to an exclusive clip from the audiobook below:

say no

Improve Your Life by Learning How to Say No

Sometimes people come knocking at your door because they want something from you. However, you either don’t want to work with them or that project doesn’t resonate with you or your values. Other times, you may be dealing with people already in your room, and we feel this is an important aspect of our message. Here are seven ways you can say no and not come across like a jerk (or worse):

  • If I say yes, I’m afraid I’d let you down. A very effective way to tell someone no is to tell them you believe you’d let them down if you do what they are asking. It might be because you don’t have the bandwidth, the knowledge, or the expertise to do what they are asking; but, in any case, you’re not the person to help make this idea a success, and you don’t want to disappoint them. This type of response not only gets you off the hook but also affirms your work ethic and shows you want the person and their project to succeed.
  • Know the difference between an opportunity and a distraction. Recognizing this distinction begins by knowing your own personal or professional mission. If you know your purpose/expertise/mission, then you can say no when someone comes to you with something that is a distraction to that mission. This strategy can be particularly helpful for projects that perhaps interest you in theory but don’t align with your goals and mission in practice, right now. One of the best ways to apply this concept is to use the technique below.
  • Refer them to someone more qualified. When we say no to someone, we always try to refer them to someone who is more qualified or more suited to help that person. We also try to refer them to someone whose mission is more in alignment with their project. Just because you can do something doesn’t necessarily mean you should if it’s not truly your area of expertise.
  • I don’t do that. Sometimes the request and response can be very simple. For example, when someone tries to convince Ivan to have a piece of cake or pie, he simply says, “Thanks, but I don’t eat processed sugar.” When they say something like, “Oh, just a bite,” he has no problem telling them they should feel free to have his bite—because he doesn’t eat sugar.
  • Don’t “Seinfeld” it. One of the really funny things on the old TV series Seinfeld was how the characters would go off on some crazy, complicated subterfuge or ruse and end up getting in more trouble than if they had just been candid to start with. Be polite, but be honest and direct.
  • Propose something else. If you are unable to do something that you’re being asked to do, offer them something else instead. If you are a restaurant owner, maybe you can’t afford to cater that 5K charity race for free, but maybe you can afford to donate several gift certificates for the charity to raffle. By proposing something else, you can still build a relationship.
  • When you say it, mean it! Be a broken record. Sometimes people don’t take no for an answer. Try to be polite, smile, and repeat what you said before. Don’t be surprised if you have to repeat yourself multiple times before people understand you meant what you said.

Let Me Help You Create Your Best Life

This is the premise behind the newest book, “Who’s in Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life” by Ivan Misner, Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio.

To order the book, please use this link: https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom

The Kindle edition of “Who’s in Your Room” is available for a limited time for only $1. Download it while the Cyber Monday special lasts.
https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoomKindle

Free Webinars

Let Me Help You Create Your Best Life

The book, “Who’s in Your Room” (the public edition), is now available.  The lessons in this book are not only relevant to growing your business and your involvement in networking groups they’re also relevant to your personal life.   Therefore, I will be conducting regular free webinars to create your best life.
Free Webinars
Have you ever thought about this?: Am I living my BEST life?  Do you ever feel overwhelmed or inefficient?  Are you truly happy with everyone that you have around you?  Are you having trouble achieving some of your life goals?  If you said Yes to any of these questions, don’t worry – there’s hope.  You see, the quality of your life depends on the people in your life.  The book, “Who’s in Your Room“, will help you discover the secret to creating your best life by creating your best room.
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Free Webinars

I believe this book will have a bigger impact on people’s lives than any other book I’ve ever written. I’m willing to share these secrets with you in regular live webinars – for FREE.  Over the next several months, my co-authors and I will be conducting regular webinars where we will talk about the ideas from “Who’s in Your Room” and how you can apply them to your life today.  It’s all free. It costs nothing.  All we ask is that if you like the content of the book, you tell other people about it.  That’s it.  Free webinars to create your best life, and all we ask is that you be a book ambassador and let others know about the book if you feel it makes a difference for you.
 
 Free Webinars
If you would like to sign up for these free webinars or would like more information, I invite you into my room by going to this URL and signing up for the webinars: https://tinyurl.com/FreeRoomWebinars
Engines

Are the People Trying to Enter Your Room Engines or Anchors?

Over the years I’ve recognized that there are some people who are positive and supportive individuals that I really want to be around.  They are solutions focused relating to most problems and are almost always willing to talk through challenges with a positive end in mind.  These people are engines.  They help me be my best self and they motivate me to drive forward.

I’ve also noticed, as I’m sure you have, that there are some people who complain as though it were an Olympic event (for the record – it’s not!).  They tend to be negative, argumentative, and obsessed with problems.  I’ve learned not to spend much time with these people because they focus on all the things that are wrong relating to most challenges.   If all someone does is focus on problems – they become an expert on problems and not on the solutions.   These people are anchors, they hold me back and weigh me down.

Who do you surround yourself with: engines or anchors?

This is an important question for everyone.  It’s particularly important if you are trying to build a powerful personal network of people around you.  Is your network full of people who are engines helping you go to the next level in your life or your career?  Or, are they anchors weighing you down with the plethora of issues, problems, and complaints? Do they hold you back, or do they drive you forward?

The funny thing here is that no-one thinks they’re an anchor.  No one!  Of course, they’ll tell you that they are an engine – they just do not like the direction you are going and that’s why they come across the way they do.  For the record – they’re an anchor – with a motor attached. My advice is to call for “all hands on deck,” cut loose the anchors in your life, partner up with your fellow engines and go full-speed ahead.

Doorman

This is where your Doorman comes in. Your Doorman is looking for engines, people helping you go to the next level in your life. Your Doorman should forbid entrance to the anchors, people weighing you down with a plethora of issues, problems, and complaints.

This is just a little of the content from my new book, “Who’s in Your Room? The Secret to Creating Your Best Life.”  Check out the book here: https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom.

If you would like to be in my room, CLICK HERE. 

Book Ambassador

I want to invite you to be part of my room and part of my story

Do you want an invitation?

Be part of a special group of friends online and I will share with you exclusive access to me and my co-authors: Stewart Emery, and Rick Sapio. If you love to help others, we can help you connect and spread the message of keeping toxic people out of your room. Change your life and the lives of others. Click on the link below to learn more about promoting our self-improvement message with your family and friends.

Become a Book Ambassador for my newest book, “Who’s in Your Room?”

What do you get as a Book Ambassador?

1. Live webinars on elements of the book where you will get the author’s
perspective on how to apply the room concept in your life and in your business.
2. “Ask the Author” webinars where you can ask the authors any question you
would like about the content and how they apply it in their lives.
3. Special downloads from the book website.
4. Special videos just for Book Ambassadors.
5. Materials and content that you can use on your social media regarding ideas
from the book.
6. Opportunities for live 1-2-1 sessions with one of the authors.

Click here to learn more:

Ambassadors

Best Life

The Secret to Your Best Life… “Who’s in Your Room”

Learn how to live your best life, embrace happiness, and discover “Who’s in Your Room”.

This 2 ½ minute video will give you a good overview of what the book is about. Therefore, please watch this video at https://tinyurl.com/CreateYourBestLife

Live Your Life to The Best

This is what Jack Canfield says about this book: “Who’s in Your Room is one of the most powerful personal-development books you will ever read.  It has changed my life and it will change yours.”
The quality of your life depends on the people in your life. First, learn the secret to creating your best life by managing “Who’s in Your Room.” Therefore, change your life and click on this link: https://tinyurl.com/WhosInYourRoom
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