Go from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be

Go from Where You Are to Where You Want to Bestring(45) "Go from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be"

My friend Jack Canfield is a best-selling author with hundreds of books, including The Success Principles and the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. He has also been my guest on The Official BNI Podcast. This blog is from my podcast conversation with Jack about how to get from where you currently are to where you want to be. We discuss his book, The Success Principles, and the companion book, The Success Principles Workbook, which helps people integrate the principles into their personal and professional success stories.

Many people read helpful books like The Success Principles and are excited about the ideas they get. However, many don’t do the things that they learned about – sometimes they need more support. Jack shares some ideas, exercises, and activities from The Success Principles Workbook which provide a way to integrate and apply the principles.

Recognizing OUR Part in Creating Our Experiences

It’s easy to talk about taking 100% responsibility and giving up blaming and complaining. But to actually do that requires some interaction with you and your thinking process. There is an exercise called ‘The Difficult and Troubling Experience Exercise’ where you answer a series of questions such as “What’s a difficult or troubling experience in your life – at work or at home?” And then “How are you creating it?” Because we’re always doing something to create the current situation.

Jack shares the story of a person he met who was getting robbed all the time, and Jack asked him, “Where do you live?” He said, “New York.” Jack said, “In an apartment?” He said, “Yeah.” Jack: “What floor is it?” He replied, “The first floor.” Jack asked him if he had bars on the apartment windows to which the man answered, “No.” “Do you have triple locks on the door?” “No.”  “Do you have a alarm system to alert the police if someone breaks in?” “No.”
Jack then asked him, “What are you pretending not to know? You live on the first-floor apartment in New York City. So, one of the next questions is what are you pretending not to know? And then the question is – What’s the payoff for keeping it like it is?”

What’s the cost of keeping the situation like it is?
What would you rather be experiencing?
What actions would you need to take to create what you really want?
On a scale of one to 10, are you likely to do that?
And when will you do that?  

These types of questions take you through a process of looking at what’s not working in your life and how you’re creating it. You’re not a victim but there’s something you’re doing to either create, promote, or allow it to happen.

Life Purpose

Jack recommends three exercises to help us get clarity about our life purpose.

  1. It’s important to have a vision. He suggests creating a vision for seven different areas of your life.
  2. Goal Setting. Turn your vision into goals and create an affirmation for each of your goals.
  3. Create a mastermind group. Determine the five or six people you would like in your group and decide the date by which you’re going to call them. Meet with your mastermind group virtually or in person every two weeks.

 

Accountability Partner Culture

For business success, find an accountability partner to talk to every morning. Tell them five things that you plan to do that day to achieve your breakthrough goal, and then they tell you five things they are going to do to achieve their breakthrough goal. The next day, you hold each other accountable for the five things you each said you would do.
Do this for five days each week.

I find that many people like this concept, however they say, “I don’t have time to do that.” What I think is crazy, is they’re stuck in their life and they’re having challenges. They’re not making things work, but they don’t have a few minutes a day to do one thing to help themselves.

Create an accountability partner culture. Take five minutes, once a day. The reality is you can’t afford NOT to do it. As humans, we avoid doing the things that are uncomfortable or difficult, even if they have the greatest long-term benefits.

Often, we never do the big goals or make the big breakthroughs that you do when you have an accountability partner and a mastermind group. Those five minutes every morning are so valuable. Jack told me, “It’s literally been one of the greatest secrets of my success and the people in my company.”

One Thing at a Time

Many people spend way too much time doing things that are ineffective and then they don’t have the time they want for their family, for self-care, for exercise, meditation, or even healthy eating. It can be overwhelming when you try to do everything at once. When we are overwhelmed, we usually don’t do anything.
Do one thing at a time, space it out, and then integrate it, so that it becomes part of your natural experience – it becomes a habit.

Jack recommends that people create FOUR new habits a year. Resist the urge to do more than that. If you create four new habits a year – for your health, business, home – AND you stick with them, in five years you’ll have 20 new habits! The habits that you have are what get you where you want to go. OR, if they are bad habits, they’re keeping you stuck. Implementing positive changes, over time and consistently, can change your life and help you get to where you want to be.

I love Jack and appreciate how much he shares to help others be successful. Check out his website, his blog, and the many free resources he offers. I can tell you firsthand that he is somebody who walks the talk. He doesn’t just talk about success. He lives the principles that he talks about.

They’ll Interview Anyone With a Bookstring(38) "They’ll Interview Anyone With a Book"

My assistant recently asked me about something I said during a presentation. She thought it seemed to contradict what I have previously shared about self-talk and the power of our words.

In that presentation I was talking about the early days of BNI®, the international networking organization I founded, and how I tried to get some publicity by contacting the local media. They asked what I was promoting and when I said, “My company,” they suggested that I take out an advertisement.

I continued telling the story by saying, “However, I discovered that the media would interview any idiot with a book, and I have 26.”

My assistant questioned the word ‘idiot’ because it seemed incongruent with my typical positive words. I realized that I hadn’t shared the context behind that line. So now I am going to share the rest of the story.

Going back to those early days of wanting publicity for my business…

Yes, the media LOVES to interview people who have written a book. And as a new author, I sure was excited when I was invited to be on a television morning show to talk about my book!

It was an early interview and I arrived on time that morning. They took me to the guest waiting room until it was my turn to join the hosts on the set. At this point, I’m feeling great; I’m feeling really good about myself and my accomplishments thus far. I am anticipating the increased interest in my organization that would result from the publicity boost of being on TV.

And then a man walked into the room. He was completely dressed as a vampire, a full-on, unmistakable vampire with the black cape, the dark eyes, and the vampire teeth. Keep in mind, that this was not October, and it was not the season for Halloween costumes.

Well, I just had to ask. I asked him what he was doing dressed like that. He reached into his cape, took out a book, and proudly said, “I wrote a book on vampirism!”

To which I thought to myself, “They’ll interview anyone with a book.”

That is the reason I said what I said in my presentation. Every time I tell the story about getting publicity for my company through interviews about my books, I always visualize that guy. Those words that I thought back then in that waiting room are fresh in my mind and I share them when I’m telling the story.

We laughed as I told my assistant all of this and she said, “Oh, I get it now. I love it!”

It’s all about the context. Sometimes you have to share a bit more information for people to fully understand your message. 

What are your thoughts? I’d love to hear them.

Networking Quotient

Build Your Referability Degree and Networking Quotientstring(54) "Build Your Referability Degree and Networking Quotient"

Today’s guest blog is an extract from the book, “Networking Quotient” by my good friends and BNI® Leaders, Paulo Corsi and YP Lai, about two immensely powerful measurements that determine the ability of your network to generate business for you, your Networking Quotient and your Referability Degree.

As a networker, have you ever asked yourself how effective your network is in bringing business referrals? And have you ever pondered which strategy will bring you better results? Should you expand your network and get to know more people? Should you build a deeper relationship with the people who are already in your network? Well, the secret to getting the answers is being able to measure your network. That sounds simple, right? However, what is the right measurement to use? The size of your network? The depth of your network? Or perhaps something else?

Let me introduce you to two powerful measurements that determine the ability of your network to generate business for you.

Your Referability Degree

The Referability Degree points out how much of your network is working for you. However, it does not tell you if your network has the right size to generate more business opportunities for you.

The Referability Degree is calculated by dividing the number of contacts in your network who have given you a referral in the last six months and dividing this number by the total number of contacts you have. (e.g., 30 people that gave you referrals / 100 people in your network gives you a Referability Degree of 30%).

  • If you have a Referability Degree of 50% or less:

Your focus should be on developing better relationships with the people who do not regularly give you business referrals. Through nurturing the relationship, you will teach them how to generate referrals for you. At the same time, you will be learning ways on how to create value and bring referrals for the other person and develop a long-term mutually beneficial relationship.

  • When your Referability Degree is above 50%:

You are ready to expand your network. As you expand your network, you should simultaneously strengthen the relationship so that both parties can bring good quality business referrals for each other.

Imagine a person that has a Referability Degree of 90% – which is exceedingly high. However, the size of the network is only 10 people. This indicates that he has deep relationships with his existing contacts but has only an extremely limited network. In this scenario, he must expand his network to more people. A network of 10 people will not be sufficient to create a constant flow of opportunities for him.

Your Networking Quotient

The Networking Quotient is simply the number of people that have given business referrals to you in the past 6 months.

For a continual flow of business by referrals, it is recommended to have a Networking Quotient of at least 100. This means having an active community of at least 100 people that you are constantly in contact with, build rapport with and know how to bring you good quality referrals. Building up your Networking Quotient takes time, and with constant practice, it will become your daily habit.

“Networking Quotient”

Networking Quotient  Paulo Corsi and YP Lai in their book, “Networking Quotient”, share in detail how to calculate the Referability Degree and the Networking Quotient. And more importantly, they share proven strategies to build your Referability Degree and your Networking Quotient.

The eBook / Kindle version of “Networking Quotient” is on sale for $1.99 until 11 pm (PDT) TONIGHT – April 1st, 2021.

 Download the eBook version of “Networking Quotient” today.

 

“Work Less Earn More”

Work Less Earn More

Accompanying the Networking Quotient book, YP Lai has written another book, “Work Less Earn More” about the 10 proven strategies to be wealthier, healthier & happier.

This book acts as a guide for busy entrepreneurs to get their lives into harmony, ensuring that while they are in pursuit of material wealth to provide for the family, they also focus on other important things in life like health, fitness, and happiness.

The eBook / Kindle version of “Work Less, Earn More” is on sale for 99¢ on Amazon until 11 pm (PDT) on April 2nd, 2021.

Download the eBook version of “Work Less Earn More” today.

Imprint

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In 2014, I came to Elisabeth with this crazy idea for a science fiction short story called “Imprint”.

As a business and self-help author, this was way outside my wheelhouse but it was an idea that intrigued me greatly. She loved the idea so much she sat down and wrote a rough draft of the story. In 2017 she even did a pitch at a SXSW conference in Austin for the story to be done as a TV show or movie. Over the last several years we spoke about completing the story several times, but business and life had other priorities. After her passing several months ago, I felt compelled to complete the story and publish it. This short story is the end result of our combined efforts.

“Imprint” is available on Amazon.com for only 99 cents: https://tinyurl.com/ImprintShortStory

Take a look at the story at Amazon. If you like it – give it a review (if you don’t like it, forget I suggested it). 😊
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Charming and unexpected by Victoria Wacek

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Stories

We All Tell Storiesstring(19) "We All Tell Stories"

Today’s guest blog is an extract from “The Introvert’s Edge to Networking”, by Matthew Pollard about the transformative power of stories. Matthew is the founder and CEO of Rapid Growth, LLC. He is a good friend who has shared much of my content on his platform. I thought you might enjoy some of Matthew’s great material.

Bethany and Shan Jenkins were luxury custom home builders. They worked with people who wanted that “crown jewel,” the $3–$10 million home that blew you away. While networking, they’d meet people who wanted a home like this, but would say, “We’re looking for a designer now; we’ll reach out to you when we’re looking for a builder.” Or, “We have a builder we like already; we’re just looking for a designer to get it drafted.” When they’d try to network with realtors, the response was generally, “We already have a builder we recommend.”

But Jenkins Custom Homes isn’t just a builder—it’s a design-build firm. The distinction is important. When the design and build are done by separate firms, the two sides rarely communicate well with each other, leading to last-minute chaos. The stress can take its toll on a marriage, leave customers with a house they resent, and even turn a dream home into a nightmare. That’s why it’s so important to work with a design-build company who knows what the extras cost and how to design their client’s dream home within budget.

The Jenkins team had a problem communicating this. Bethany felt they came off sounding as though they were bad-mouthing the competition—or trying to scare prospects into giving Jenkins their business. I told Bethany we could create a system for her that leveraged her natural introverted strengths. She asked, “How do I not sound salesy when people say, ‘I’ve already got a relationship with a designer; I’m just looking for a builder’—or vice versa?” “Just tell them stories,” I said. “For example, have you ever had a prospect come to you with a designer’s plans, only to inform them that the design didn’t fit their budget?”

Stories Sell

Bethany told me about Megan, who came to their office, explained what she wanted, then handed over her designer’s plans. The discussion went well, so to conclude the meeting, Shan said, “Great, let us take a look over your plans in more detail and we’ll get back to you on a fixed price.”

Megan replied, quite anxiously, “Can you just give me a ballpark figure now?” Normally, it takes time to calculate all the costs correctly. But Megan was quite insistent. So, Shan gave her a rough guesstimate. Megan burst into tears. She told them that she had informed her designer what her budget was. But after getting the plans, she’d gone to four different builders whose prices were double what she’d budgeted. Megan had worked with her designer for two years to plan the home of her dreams . . . and now five builders had told her there was no way she could afford it. She was either going to have to cancel building her home or spend more money to design a lesser home, always knowing it wasn’t what she really wanted. “How could this happen?” she cried.

I said to Bethany, “As unfortunate as poor Megan’s situation is, it’s a perfect story for showing—not telling—people why working with a designer and builder separately is so risky.” Today, when networking, if someone says, “I’ve already got a relationship with a designer, I’m just looking for a builder,” Bethany simply responds, “Congratulations on starting the process toward your dream home. What a huge milestone. If you’ve already locked in with a designer you’re happy with, excellent. However, has anyone told you about going the designer-then-builder path versus the design-build path, and why it matters so much?”

Many look puzzled and say, “No, what’s that?” Bethany continues: “Well, the major difference is—actually, you know what? Let me give you an example. See, when Megan came to us . . .” Bethany then wraps it up with: “So, of course, I’m not saying if you design and build separately this will happen to you, and I really hope it doesn’t. However, regardless of whether you use us or another design-build option, I strongly suggest you explore the possibility.”

When they do, who do you think they’ll see as the only logical choice? Isn’t that so much easier than self-promotion or feeling like you’re coming across as instilling fear? A simple story neatly sidesteps all that. You’re not expressly telling them they’re doing it wrong, so it doesn’t come across as judgmental. You’re not lecturing. You’re not even saying they should hire you or that their way won’t work. Megan’s story served as a way to educate prospects on the risks while inspiring interest in a different solution. It showed that Bethany understood her listeners, their fears, and how to avoid them.

Megan’s story and two other stories catapulted Jenkins Custom Homes from an annual turnover of $6 million after almost twenty years of operation, to more than $18 million the following year. Moreover, it took an introvert from hating the idea of selling and networking to loving it and dominating her industry! That’s the transformative power of stories.

The Introvert’s Edge to Networking

Matthew Pollard’s new book, The Introvert’s Edge to Networking, is available now.

Download the first chapter free here and check it out for yourself.

Purchase your copy of The Introvert’s Edge to Networking today.

When you purchase, Matthew will also give you free instant access to over $700 worth of bonuses, including The Official Introvert’s Edge Step-By-Step Implementation Training and a personal invitation to his private Facebook community of like-minded introverts.

To claim your bonuses, sign up here with your name, email and order confirmation number.

share

When is the Right Time to Share?string(32) "When is the Right Time to Share?"

Today’s guest blog is an extract from Andy Lopata’s book, “Just Ask”, about when was the best time for me to share my cancer diagnosis with others.

When Ivan Misner was diagnosed with prostate cancer, working out how to fight his illness was just one challenge he faced.

Ivan was the figurehead and CEO of the world’s largest face-to-face business networking organisation, Business Network International (BNI). As much as he might have liked to focus on his medical challenges with just the support of family and close friends, he didn’t have that option. Particularly as he had chosen to fight the cancer naturally, by drastically changing his diet.

Ivan told me how he planned to share the news with his wider network and different stakeholders in his business. “People are going to find out, they are going to ask, ‘Why are you eating so crazy? Why are you losing weight?’ I’m going to doctor’s appointments all the time, so I figured just talk about the elephant in the room, calm everyone down and tell them that you have a plan.

“I made a list of eight different levels of people. Number one was extended family; my wife and kids were technically number one but they found out immediately. Number two, close family friends. Number three were key management people in the company, the top managers in BNI.

“Number four were the employees at headquarters. I literally called a staff meeting and said, ‘Hey, this is what’s going on, I just wanted you to know, what questions do you have for me? That was really important; if you don’t let them ask their questions, they are going to be asking each other and they are going to be making stuff up.

“Franchisees worldwide were number five. The sixth one was global employees and independent contractors. Number seven was an email that directors could share with members and number eight was a public posting on my blog.”

Ivan was inspired by self-development guru Brian Tracy, who had suffered from throat cancer a couple of years before and who had been very open on his blog about his journey. Ivan resolved to share ‘the good, the bad and the ugly’, making sure that people would know at all times how he was progressing. He posted every three or four months for the first year and then once a year after that.

“It calmed everyone down. This may not work for everyone but I liked it because everyone knew I had a plan. I kept saying to them, ‘If it doesn’t work, I will go and get surgery, I promise.’

“You can’t control the message but you can manage it. I was constantly managing the message, to the point of writing a book sharing the full story and the recipes that I used to completely change my diet”.

Timing is a key factor in ensuring that you benefit the most from sharing with the people around you. Leave something too long and you may find that you’ve missed the moment when other people’s help would have been most effective or their suggestions would have worked. You also face the risk, as Ivan observed, that people notice for themselves that something is wrong and you start to lose control of the message.

If you ask too early, you may feel that people will see you as someone who is not able to find solutions for themselves, who panics or who overshares. Every situation is different. Ivan calculated when he should share his news with each interested party to remain in control of the conversation. Think about the best time to share and whether different people need to be involved at different times.

Andy Lopata‘s book, “Just Ask”, is available now.

The book is available to buy on Amazon (UK) and via Amazon (US) and from booksellers around the world.

Digital copies of Just Ask are available via: http://lopata.co.uk/justask/

Please click here to find a list of online outlets.

You can also order it from an independent book retailer in your area. 

Elisabeth Misner

Elisabeth Misner – Humanitarian, Author, Minister, and Momstring(64) "Elisabeth Misner – Humanitarian, Author, Minister, and Mom"

Elisabeth was the love of my life.  She brought color into my black and white world. Elisabeth Prevo was born on June 13th, 1964, in Fort Worth, Texas to John and Mary Prevo.  She was the eldest of three children.  Her brother is Jon Prevo and her sister is Tammy Prevo. She obtained both a Bachelor’s degree and a Master’s degree in theology.  She was later ordained as a Christian minister. Elisabeth started her career as a chiropractic assistant where she met her husband, Ivan Misner.  She left that field to work for BNI where she served in many roles. She then transitioned to the Marketing Director handling PR and marketing for the organization.

In the last few years of her life, Elisabeth called herself a “Lovetarian.”  She loved people and she loved life.  Anyone who knew Elisabeth knew this to be true.  She was a gentle, loving soul who will be missed by everyone who knew her well. Elisabeth Misner passed away on October 29th, 2020. She is survived by me and her three children, Ashley Misner, Dorian Prin, and Trey Misner Tempest.

“All my life I have found creative ways to incorporate service to others into my professional life. From being a chiropractic assistant, managing special projects for BNI, and leading the prayer ministry at my church, my one question has always been, How can I help you? I want to know what I can do that will make things better for those whom I support and encourage.” Quote by Elisabeth Misner

Humanitarian Efforts of Elisabeth Misner

Givers Gain was a way of life for Elisabeth and myself. She taught us all how easy it is to be a positive part of someone else’s story.

  • As a child growing up in eastern Tennessee, Elisabeth collected the discarded aluminum cans from the various roadways near her home and recycled them. Furthermore, she donated all the funds from recycling the cans to the scouting program at her church.
  • As an adult living in Southern California, Elisabeth donated her gently used business suits to the House of Ruth for their clients to wear at job interviews. The House of Ruth provides critical, life-saving, and supportive services to victims of domestic violence in Pomona, California since 1977.
  • In 2005, Elizabeth Misner was named the Red Cross Humanitarian of the Year for her disaster relief support after Hurricane Katrina.
  • Internationally, Elisabeth Misner helped Building Blocks to build schools in Bangalore. This organization works for the betterment of slum children across India by providing them with a well-rounded education on par with most private schools.
  • Elisabeth supported the Little Rock Inclusive Early Childhood Development Centre in Kenya. They provide a great start at growth and learning to disadvantaged and special needs children living in the urban slums. They make it possible for children to reach physical, emotional, and cognitive development milestones and gain school readiness skills.
  • Elisabeth was the co-founder with me of the BNI Foundation and helped to raise millions of dollars for children and education all around the world. She also created their “Business Voices” initiative which creates an awareness of the local educational needs with the local business professionals.
  • Elisabeth was the administrator of The Misner Family Foundation. Beth, our three adult kids, and I would decide together which causes or charities to support as a family.

“It is so overwhelmingly gratifying to be able to impact the lives of kids all over our planet, whether they are in Kansas or India. I was raised with an understanding that we have an obligation to make life better for others wherever and whenever we can.” Quote by Elisabeth Misner

Books Authored by Elisabeth Misner

Elisabeth Misner was a New York Times Bestselling author. She wrote or contributed to seven books. Her latest book was published just one month before her death.  It is titled, Called Out of the Church.

Elisabeth Misner was an Ordained Minister

One thing that would tell you a lot about Elisabeth is that she transitioned from being called Beth to being called Elisabeth.  She did that because she said that Beth means “house” and “Elisabeth” means “house of God.”

Elisabeth was an ordained minister with a Bachelor’s degree in theology. Plus, a Master’s degree in theology with an emphasis on spiritual formation. She was the founder of the Journey Center (Claremont), a center for spirituality, healing, and wholeness in California. Elisabeth’s spiritual journey planted the seed of passion within her to be an instrument of peace and grace for others. She had a way of working with her clients to tap into their unconditional love. Her goal was to bring them to spiritual clarity and peace. It did not matter their faith path or tradition. Elisabeth was a meditation and prayer leader.

“There can be no doubt that the ability to intuitively listen to the voice of the Spirit is important.” Quote by Elisabeth Misner

Elisabeth Misner Loved Being a Mom

Elisabeth would always say that the most important job in her life was that of “mom”.  She loved being a mom and she immensely loved our three children: Ashley Misner, Dorian Prin, and Trey Misner Tempest. While raising our children she also obtained a black belt in Shotokan Karate. Finally, Elisabeth studied Tai Chi and later become a Qigong Master teaching at the Austin Spa Resort in Texas.

“I have always been a full-time mom, and feel that God has taught me so much in the process of raising these three amazing young people.”  Quote by Elisabeth Misner

Final Thoughts on Elisabeth Misner

Elisabeth’s hobbies and interests included gardening, scrapbooking, and travel. Furthermore, she also loved reading, writing, painting, drawing, quilting, speaking, decorating homes, fine art, wine, astronomy, and meditation. Beth was fluent in Spanish and German, the language of her Mennonite great-grandmother, Elisabeth Kroeker. Yes, she was named after her. Elisabeth also spoke French and she knew sign language and a little Japanese.  Elisabeth was truly a life-long learner. She especially loved Texas. Beth always told people she was from Texas, even when they lived in California.  Texas was her home wherever she resided.  She was incredibly happy to come back to Texas for the last six years of her life. The world, Texas, and our home are a little less perfect without her in it.

In Lieu of flowers, our family would prefer donations to the BNI Foundation.

Please visit her memorial site and leave your memories or stories about Elisabeth:
https://www.forevermissed.com/elisabeth-misner/lifestory

I will be making an announcement later on Facebook when her online Memorial will be held. All are welcome to attend.

Request an Introduction

Request an Introduction to Meet a Big Namestring(42) "Request an Introduction to Meet a Big Name"

If you do not know someone personally and want to reach them, I would not contact them directly. Instead, I would find someone that knows them and I would request an introduction. When you request an introduction to someone well-known or very successful from a trusted third party, it smooths the path to meeting them as you network up.

That is exactly how I met Harvey Mackay, author of “Swim with the Sharks without Being Eaten Alive”. Back in the ’90s, I had not published any best-selling books yet, so very few people knew who I was. Still, I wanted to meet Mr. Mackay to ask him if he would write a section of my upcoming book. I thought he would make a good contributor as he had written about networking before. No matter how many times I tried, I could not get past his assistant without name recognition.

A well-connected driver

I started asking everyone I knew if they knew anyone who might have a connection to Mr. Mackay personally. A year later, I was on a book tour in another state. A BNI member in that city picked me up at the airport. While on the one hour drive to the hotel, he asked me many questions about my book. He attended the book tour event that week and asked if I would like a ride back to the airport the next day. I agreed. On the ride to the airport, he thanked me for all the suggestions I had shared on how to build a powerful personal network. Then he asked, “Is there anything I can do for you?” 

So, I said to him, “I’ve been trying to connect with Harvey Mackay. I have not had any luck getting past his assistant. You wouldn’t happen to know someone that knows Harvey, would you?” He said, “Sure, I know his assistant pretty well. In fact, I have her mobile number”. He went on to explain that he always volunteers to drive visiting authors from the airport because he learns from them during the hour drive. That is why he volunteered to drive me.

Request an Introduction to a gatekeeper

He knows Mr. Mackay’s assistant because he talked to her many times the previous year when he volunteered to drive Harvey Mackay to/from the airport. He wanted to know why to qualify me before he passed it on to his trusted contact. I told him, “I wanted to ask Mackay if he would be willing to contribute to a book I was writing called “Masters of Networking”. Mackay had written a book on networking and I knew he would be a great contributor”. The driver said he would be happy to reach out to Mackay’s assistant and request an introduction to him.

Introduced to Harvey Mackay

Guess who called me the next week? Not the assistant, but Harvey Mackay himself. Mackay is an icon in the business world. I was honored to have a fantastic conversation with him. I learned that he absolutely “walks the talk” when it comes to networking. He took the time to learn about me and my book. My luck changed when he agreed to write a contribution to my book. Over the years, we have talked together on many occasions. He was even a keynote speaker at one of our BNI conventions. We have strengthened our relationship and I consider Harvey a good friend.

I was able to request an introduction to Harvey Mackay because I asked people who I knew and who I believe trusted me. I would ask people who trusted me for the referral. They knew I would not betray their trust. People do not want to give a referral to someone who just wants to sell something to their contacts. It still works for me today.

Infinite Giving

Infinite Givingstring(15) "Infinite Giving"

I have a new book,Infinite Giving”, that was just released this week and is available for purchase on Amazon.

Our book reveals for the very first time, the 7 principles of Givers Gain®  which leads to a life of giving not just for the benefit of others, but most importantly for you as well.  All the while allowing you to protect your time, energy, and resources to ensure you can practice Infinite Giving throughout the world. This law of reciprocity has allowed hundreds of thousands of people to take part in this powerful philosophy while also building a business to support them and those they care about. Givers Gain seeks to imagine a world where giving is a strength, and everybody can create success through Infinite Giving.  The philosophy of Givers Gain® has the potential to change the world. Full stop.

The Seven Principles of Givers Gain®

  1. Are They in Your Light?                     ∞ Do you want to live a more fulfilled existence, one
  2. Give Without Expectation                    where you’re building a life and business where you
  3. Give More Than Expected                     don’t have to choose between winning or helping?
  4. Give What You Can Afford                ∞ Have you ever felt like people take advantage of your
  5. It’s OK to Gain                                           good nature, both in life and business?
  6. Stay Humble                                         ∞ Do you feel alone when you need help, despite your
  7. The Gratitude Effect                               previous generous activities?

The Infinite Giving Authors

Two Brits and a Yank make an important decision about the book in this video.

Dr. Ivan Misner is the Founder and Chief Visionary Officer of BNI, the world’s largest business networking organization.  He has written over 25 books including three New York Times bestsellers.

Greg Davies is a corporate trainer, inspirational speaker, and multi-award-winning Director of BNI.  He also has a passion for stories and is known as The StoryFella, using narratives to inspire people and businesses all over the world.

Julian Lewis is a portfolio entrepreneur, with diverse interests including, IT, film making, and business coaching, he is also a multi-award-winning Director of BNI.  He continues to coach, mentor, and consult to businesses globally.

Infinite Giving is available for purchase on Amazon.  

Infinite Giving

∞ Order multiple copies of this book for yourself and

    others.

∞ The possibilities of who you can be GIVING this book

    to are INFINITE.

∞ Please use this link to order your own copy of this

    amazing book: https://tinyurl.com/InfiniteGiving

 

Acclaim for Infinite Giving

“The perfect balance between developing yourself and impacting others”
Lisa Nichols, Author of Abundance Now

“If you like stories, you’ll love this book. These aren’t just stories that inspire because they show vs. tell; they’re real-life examples from around the world that motivate you to give generously because it’s a shortcut to a meaningful life, successful business, and enduring legacy. Read it and reap.”
Sam Horn, CEO of the Tongue Fu! Training Institute 

“These principles will always work if you work the principles”
Jack Canfield, Author of Success Principles and Chicken Soup for the Soul

NETWORKS AREN’T FLAT: The Seven Stages of Professional Relationships by Andy Lopatastring(85) "NETWORKS AREN’T FLAT: The Seven Stages of Professional Relationships by Andy Lopata"

Today’s guest blog is an extract from Andy Lopata’s book, “Connected Leadership”, about the seven stages of professional relationships.

When we picture a network it’s easy to visualize a flat entity, a single structure comprising all of the people we know. Much network theory focuses on the number of people in the average network, with classic studies such as Girard’s Law of 250(1) and the Dunbar Number(2) often quoted.

In my opinion, both of these studies are flawed. They are flawed in their interpretation: The Dunbar Number was never intended as an indication of the average network size. They are outdated: they were both developed in the last century, well before social media dominated our lives and networks. And flawed in the basic premise: Girard’s Law is based on the observation that the average number of guests at a wedding or funeral is 500. I went to a funeral recently that was described as ‘busy’ and I can promise you that nowhere near 500 people attended.

The way both studies have been used in network theory is the biggest flaw. We have been told that ‘the average network size is 250’ (based on Girard’s Law). Other objections aside, this oversimplifies the nature of a network.

Rather than being a flat structure or simple grouping of contacts, networks are more complicated organisms with people flowing in and out and between various levels. I tend to visualize a network as seven levels of a professional relationship with a group of expanding circles, much like the side section of half an onion.

The Seven Stages of Professional Relationships

Within that network, there are seven levels of a professional relationship:

  1. Recognize
  2. Know
  3. Like
  4. Trust
  5. Support
  6. Advocate
  7. Friend (moving into your personal network) 

 

Towards the center of the network are people you have a lot of time for and want to support. That feeling is likely to be reciprocal and you’d be available whenever the other party needs and, at stages six and seven, actively looking out for each other.

This is what we’d call your trusted network, people you are likely to see day in day out, week in and week out (although absence doesn’t necessarily exclude people from your trusted network).

As you move further out through the layers, the relationship becomes a little less trusted, not as deep. You might see each other less frequently, be less inclined to share openly with each other, or ask for help.

At the outer edges of your network are people who come in and out. If we meet at an event or dinner party I’ll be in your network for a few days. By that, I mean that if we bump into each other or I call you, you will remember me and know who I am. But that link is tenuous. After a few days or weeks, we will probably be strangers again.

Compare this to someone in the center of your network. You could probably go three years or more without speaking to each other but still, pick up where you left off as if no time had passed.

People on the outskirts of your network will come in and out. If you want to embed people in your network, your first challenge is to get beyond that outer circle and into their long-term memory.

 

Andy Lopata‘s book, “Connected Leadership” can be bought from amazon.com at a promotional price of $0.99 TODAY. As Ivan’s readership is global, this page lists the book on all of Amazon domains. 

Case Studies

How to Create Case Studies that Make Customers Buy, Engage and Ascendstring(69) "How to Create Case Studies that Make Customers Buy, Engage and Ascend"

I’ve asked Robert Skrob to write another guest blog for my site.  Robert is also the author of “Retention Point, which I highly recommend.  He previously shared the topics of “The New Customers Experience” and “Creating a Vibrant Community Around Your Company” on my blog.  Today, he is sharing the topic of creating case studies. Read closely – Robert is truly an expert.

Creating Case Studies

Your customer has three important decisions to make about you and your products. With each decision you have the opportunity to win or lose the customer.

Those decision points are:

  1. Should I give this product a try?
  2. I bought, is this really worth what I invested in time and money?
  3. I’ve been a customer for a while, I’ve enjoyed this in the past but is this still worthy of my time and money?

There’s one marketing tool that can help your customer choose you each time: a well-crafted client case study.

Really? A client case study?

Yes. These case studies and client stories are the most powerful tools you have on your side to foster strong relationships with potential customers, new customers, and long-time customers.

The publishing industry has undergone a huge transformation in recent years with subscriptions at historic lows. Today, Business Week is a shell of what it was with fewer than 950,000 subscribers each month. People Magazine, however, has more than 3.5 million subscribers. People want to read about other people.

Your customers want to hear about people like them. They want to hear stories of striving, overcoming, and of the underdog beating more powerful rivals. As great as your teachings and training resources are for your members, these stories are what they really want. You’ll attract and retain your customers in proportion to how well you deliver these stories.

These stories also prove that what you say is true. When you deliver example after example of individuals who have used your product or service and succeeded, you impact how your members think about your program and themselves. Even if a customer hasn’t gotten results. After reading or watching a video about one of your client success stories, they think, “Gee, maybe this is possible.”

After enough of these stories, your customer says to himself, “If that guy can do it, I can do it, too.” After this mindset transformation, she’s a lot more likely to use what she purchased and consider buying more. Which brings us to the question of the day:

How do you write a terrific client success story?

Recently, a long-time client asked me the following question about case studies; perhaps you have wondered something similar:

“My question for you is do you use these questions on clients based on what YOU did for them? YOUR process? Meaning, should I do these to sell myself and my product? Or do I put these forward as their own case studies of how my client became successful and leave me out? Then just mention some of the things I teach?”

On how far to promote yourself and your strategies in your case studies — it depends on the how you are using them.

If you are presenting case studies within a sales presentation, then you’ll want to make it clear where you were involved.

Or, if you are presenting this case study to existing members, you may be advocating a key philosophy. In this case, you may indicate the person is a member or client, then describe how using a particular product or service you sell created the impact.

To summarize: If you are in an overt sales situation, then be overt about your involvement. Then, in many other cases, it may be appropriate to illustrate the power of implementing your philosophy.

My formula for creating case studies is simple. I start by recording an interview with my member. I then provide the interview transcript to a writer to create a written case study.

Here are interview questions to get you started.

As you read the questions, replace the words “your member breakthrough process” with the name of your product or coaching program:

  • What’s your background? How did you get started doing what you are doing now?
  • How did you discover “your member breakthrough process”?
  • What did you think of it when you first saw it?
  • How did you get started implementing “your member breakthrough process”?
  • What has changed in your life since you discovered “your member breakthrough process”?
  • What advice do you have for someone else who has just discovered “your member breakthrough process” and is deciding whether or not to try it?

For best results I conduct these interviews personally. I can explore areas that would be interested to members by asking follow-up questions. However, if time is short I’ll often send these questions out as a survey instead.

Once I have a good interview recorded, I use the transcript to craft a compelling success story.

Once you have these case studies, you can use them in presentations, monthly newsletters, pull them together into books to give to prospects, or include them in email follow-up sequences to convert more prospects int customers.

Use demonstrations, capture case studies everywhere you can, and teach through examples rather than relying only on lectures.

Robert Skrob is the #1 expert in membership and customer retention and the author of the book, Retention Point The Single Biggest Secret to Membership and Subscription Growth. He has helped hundreds of membership programs launch and then grow from start-ups to become some of the largest membership and subscription companies in the world.

 

Raymond Aaron

Raymond Aaron shares how to write a bookstring(40) "Raymond Aaron shares how to write a book"

Fellow Transformational Leadership Council (TLC) member and friend, Raymond Aaron, discusses with me in this video below his “10-10-10 PROGRAM™”. It is a book writing program that he is running for coaching authors and it is amazing. Raymond is an expert on branding yourself to stand out from the others and has been on my blog many times over the last several years. Check out this previous blog.
X

I am a real believer in writing books to build a brand

I discovered that if I went to the media, They do not want to interview me about my company. However, they will interview anyone with a book. As I have written 24 books, I have received a lot of requests for interviews by the media. It is the best way to improve your brand. When you write your book, you are NOT selling your book, you are selling YOU. Becoming an author improves your name. In his 10-10-10 PROGRAM™,  you write the content of your book. However, Raymond will help you with the marketing messages to build your brand.

Raymond Aaron noticed that most people are drowning in the “sea of sameness”. Whatever your profession or business is, you all look the same. You need to stand out in some way and the easiest way to stand out is to write a book. Becoming a published author is easy if you get guidance on doing it right. Raymond has published 138 books. Therefore, he has figured out how to easily write a book effortlessly.

The 10-10-10 PROGRAM™

Raymond’s 10-10-10 PROGRAM™” will pull the book out of you and onto the page that you always wanted to write. If you are procrastinating or feeling overwhelmed with the process of becoming a published author, Raymond will coach you with his series of 19 “how-to videos”. You just watch each video and do the work. Once you play the 19th video, you will be holding your published book in your hand.

Please click this link to learn more about Raymond’s 10-10-10 PROGRAM™” at https://10-10-10program.com/

raymond aaron

The “10-10-10 PROGRAM™” includes:

  • 19 video series.
  • Three-day writing workshop with Raymond personally helping you with your book.
  • Private one-on-one coaching is provided to make sure that you get published.
  • Offered around the world.
  • Official book launch.
  • Award on the cover

The tuition that Raymond normally charges worldwide for this program is $2800. However, if you personally contact Raymond Aaron by email at Raymond@Aaron.com, he will offer this program to you at a 50% discount for only $1400. That’s half off with the code “IVAN”

If you think you have a book inside you, use Raymond’s program because he can help you do that. Raymond will teach you what you don’t know about writing a book. It will be easier than you think if you take Raymond up on his offer to coach you. Life is much too precious to postpone. It’s time to put yourself in your own story and write your book. The whole world changes when you have a book. 

 TLC

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